DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek characters are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc. The story contents are the creation and property of Djinn and is copyright (c) 2000 by Djinn. This story is Rated PG-13.
Devastation
by Djinn
Christine could barely contain her excitement
as the shuttle neared Spacedock. She could not believe that it had been nearly
a year since she had last seen Earth, or Spock. A year spent in pure research,
on a project that she firmly believed could make a difference to all living
beings in the Federation. Working on Genesis had been a dream
come true for her. Most of the time she had not really
noticed the time passing. They had been too busy to count the days. Always trying to get the project to the next phase. Brainstorming, testing, remixing, retesting. It had been
invigorating. And the chance to work with Carol Marcus had been more worthwhile
than Christine could ever have imagined. Carol, and her son David, were true
visionaries. The universe would owe them an enormous debt.
But now she was coming home. Her part on the
project was done. She had been given the option of staying to work with the
testing team on Reliant, or coming back to Starfleet, who had just informed her
of her promotion to Commander and had offered her the chance to direct
Emergency Operations. While it would have been interesting to stick with the
project in its final stages, she wanted to get home, to Spock.
She smiled when she thought of Spock's last
communication. He had sounded as excited as she had ever heard him when she had
told him she was coming back to stay. Her arrival was somewhat ill timed, as he
would be leaving in a few days for a cadet training cruise. But they would have
time to see each other, to talk…and do other things. She could hardly wait.
She had called Dotura,
to tell her she was returning. Her friend had been overjoyed to hear that
Christine would be back permanently. "I've missed you terribly, darling.
And I'm dying to see you, but if I know that somber Vulcan of yours, it will be
a week before he lets you out of his sight." Christine had promised to
call her as soon as Spock left on the training cruise.
As the shuttle finished docking procedures,
she waited in line with the others, hanging back a little, willing to let those
passengers off who had people waiting to meet them. Once the line thinned out
she made her way off the shuttle.
"I was beginning to worry, t'hy'la," she heard a familiar voice say.
"Spock," she stopped herself just
in time from launching herself into his arms. "What are you doing here? I
didn't expect to see you until tonight?"
He raised an eyebrow at her, "It has
been 11 months, 25 days, 5 hours, and…" he glanced at the chronometer over
the gate, "16 minutes since we said goodbye. You did not think I would
find an excuse to be at Spacedock to meet you?"
She laughed, "I guess I underestimated
you?"
"So it would seem." He beckoned her
to precede him, "Is there a reason to linger here?"
She smiled at him, aching to touch him but
resisting, "Not that I can think of."
"Then let us go," he suggested.
They made their way to the transporter pad,
waited their turns for beam down to Earth. Christine was surprised when Spock
told the technician to send them both to the pad near their apartment.
"Don't you have to work, Spock, it is barely lunchtime?"
"I took leave," he said firmly,
just as the transporter began.
They walked the short distance to the
apartment. Spock keyed the code and motioned her into their home.
She looked around the familiar surroundings,
immersing herself in the feeling of being home. Suddenly she felt a hand on her
arm, spinning her around and pulling her to him. "Spock,
what?"
"It has been so long," he said
huskily as his lips claimed hers and his fingers found the meld points. She
felt his aggression, his passion, his need for her as he pushed her up against
the wall. *T'hy'la, so long without you.*
His mind reached out to hers, his hands were
everywhere on her, she was overcome with sensation. She felt pleasure emanate
from him as he relearned her body, her mind, her heart.
"Spock, I missed you so." She let
her own hands roam all over him, hearing his gasps of pleasure. Suddenly he
picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. They stripped off each other
clothes before falling onto the bed. Spock deepened the meld as their bodies
joined.
*How could I leave this?* she thought to both
of them. *
She heard his mind agreeing, *Yes, beloved,
this is paradise.*
****************************************
Much later, bodies sated finally, they lay
together on the bed talking quietly. Christine asked Spock to tell him of his
parents, their friends and former shipmates, and Saavik.
"Saavik is exceeding my expectations for
her," Spock remarked. "She will make an exceptional officer. I am
gratified to see also that she is quite popular with her classmates. Something
that is illogical to desire for her, yet I know the exclusion that can come
from being different."
"She has always blended well with us, it's her Romulan blood I
think. She is Vulcan enough to be admired, but just unpredictable enough to
be…well…"
"Human?" Spock asked in an amused
tone?
"I wouldn't want to insult you. Or her." Christine laughed. "But yes that is what
I was thinking."
"Valeris does
well also," Spock said. "She enters the academy this year. I believe
she will outperform us all."
Christine was surprised to feel a momentary
surge of jealousy. "You've spent a lot of time with her?"
"I am her sponsor, as I was Saavik's," he offered. "And she has asked me to
tutor her in some of the disciplines. She is an apt pupil."
"I'm sure." Tired of talking of Valeris, Christine changed the subject. "We have never
talked of our future. Now that we are both on Earth, perhaps it is time?"
He moved so he could see her face. "I
have sensed your desire to not rush. You know my heart, Christine. I would bond
with you today if you agreed."
She reached her hand over to touch his cheek.
"I know you would. Today is a bit soon. But what about when you get back
from this training exercise?"
"We both have leave coming. It would be
easy to arrange. You are sure? You wish to bond?"
She smiled happily at him, "Yes, Spock,
I wish to bond."
He pulled her close, kissed her gently.
"Then we shall do so."
She could feel his satisfaction with her
decision through the lingering bits of the meld. "So, Spock, how do you
plan to spend your last few days as free man?" she teased.
"With you," he answered seriously, then his playful look returned, "then with an entire class
of cadets."
She started to answer, but he cut her off
with a deep kiss. Pushing her onto her back, he reinforced the meld, *I prefer
to focus on you right now.* Her laughter through the
meld was all the encouragement that he needed.
****************************************
Four days later, Spock prepared to leave for
the training cruise. He had packed and sent his things on ahead to the
"I do not think that a cake is the
normal response to getting everyone killed on your first mission," Saavik
had noted. "Or have I missed something in my study of humans?"
Christine had chuckled, "No, you
haven't. But you couldn't win. The Kobayashi
Maru is designed that way."
"Admiral Kirk beat it. Do you know how?
Spock won't tell me."
Spock had looked warningly at Christine, who
had laughed as she said, "Well then I won't tell you either. But
sometimes, Saavik, you have to take action to help things along. Add something
to the mix."
"I don't understand."
"I know." Christine had smiled at
her. "Can I change the subject? There is something that I wanted to ask
you."
"Of course," Saavik said as she had
leaned in to swipe some frosting off the side of the cake with her finger.
Christine had glared at her. Spock had merely raised an eyebrow at their
behavior.
"Saavik, Spock and I are planning to
bond when you get back from your training cruise." She had been touched by
the heartfelt smile that crossed Saavik's face.
"I was wondering if you would stand up with me at the ceremony?"
Saavik had nodded happily. "Good that's settled then."
As Saavik was leaving to finish her
preparations she had hugged Christine tightly. "I'm so happy for you both.
You have made him content, Christine, and at peace. I am honored that you asked
me to stand with you."
That night, Spock had been especially tender,
and he was still touching her this morning. Stroking her hair
or arm as he went past, touching her face as they sat at breakfast.
"What is it?" she had finally asked him. He had taken her in his
arms, held her close. She felt his fingers begin the meld. He just held her,
letting her feel his happiness that she would soon be his wife. She was touched
and sent him back her joy in him. As he ended the meld, she heard, *I love you,
my Christine.*
Pulling away from her, he tugged down his
uniform top, "I will see you in a week."
"In a week, Spock," she replied as
she watched him walk out the door.
****************************************
A day later she got the call. Saavik appeared
on the screen, eyes swollen and red, her manner more
somber than Christine had ever seen. "Saavik, what is it? What's
wrong?"
"Christine, there's something I have
to…damn…there's no good way to say this. Something awful has happened. The ship
was in danger, we couldn't get away, and Spock went in to the…" Saavik
broke down; tears falling freely down her face. She fought for composure.
"Spock's dead, Christine. He died saving us. I wanted to be the one to
tell you. I know how much you loved him. I didn't want you hearing it in the
halls."
Christine felt her legs go weak. She managed
to find a chair. Trembling all over, she tried to think. "I don't
understand, Saavik. It was just a training exercise."
"There was an incident. We are under
orders not to discuss it. I'm so sorry, Christine."
"What about his body, the burial
arrangements?" Christine saw Saavik look down, then back up at her.
"The body is gone, burial in space.
Normally there would be a ceremony at
"Dr. Marcus? Which Dr.
Marcus?"
"David Marcus, he is a biologist working
on a special project."
Christine was suddenly afraid. She realized
she was hyperventilating. No, she thought, no, this could not have anything to
do with Genesis. This could not.
She realized Saavik had said something.
Christine looked back at her. "If David is involved, then this project,
which I know you can't discuss, it has something to do with Life from…"
Saavik finished for her, "lifelessness.
Yes. I was not aware you were familiar with it."
Christine slumped in her chair, "I
worked on it, Saavik. That's where I've been all these months."
As understanding hit her, Saavik gasped.
"Christine, you had nothing to do with this. You have enough to think
about. Don’t blame yourself. They need this channel. I have to go now. I will
check on you soon."
Christine nodded and closed the connection.
The screen was barely clear before she slid off the chair onto the floor and
wrapped her arms around her body. Rocking back and forth the same word came
pouring out, "no, no, no, no…" Then the tears came. Her pain
overwhelmed her as she wept. "Spock, Spock! Don't leave me. Not now."
She did not know how much time had passed when her weeping subsided. She lay on
the floor, staring at nothing as silent tears rolled down her face. *Spock,*
her mind screamed, *Spock don't go.* Hours later, she fell into an exhausted
sleep.
****************************************
The beeping of her communication unit woke
her up the next morning. She pulled herself off the floor and hit the
voice-only switch. It was Starfleet command. They needed to meet with her and
all the other Genesis scientists in three hours. She agreed and made her way to
her bedroom to freshen up and dress. Three hours later she was in a huge conference
room being debriefed on what had occurred on Regula
One and later on the
"Dr. Chapel?"
"Yes." As she turned back, a young
ensign she recognized from one of Spock's cadet classes handed her a data file.
"This is for you ma'am. I thought…well I
know you lived with him…I thought you should have this." He walked away
quickly.
Holding the file tightly she left the hall.
As she made her way home she noticed nothing, could not even remember making
the trip. She felt only pain and guilt warring in her. Reaching her complex,
she was surprised to see Valeris waiting. The young
woman's face was cold.
"I see that you have heard." She
moved in front of Christine. "There will be a ceremony on Vulcan, when we
bring his katra home. I am leaving for there now. I came to tell you to stay
away."
Christine was shocked at the venom in Valeris' voice. "Saavik said there would be no
ceremony this time. I'm not sure why but…"
Valeris interrupted. "Saavik knows nothing. She
understands our ways little better than you do."
"Have you always hated me, Valeris?"
Valeris thought about the question. Then calmly
said, "Hate is an emotion that I do not have. I believe that Spock
being with you was a waste of material."
Christine recognized one of Spock's favorite
phrases. "How dare you! He loved me."
Valeris practically sneered at this. "Love.
An interesting emotion that I am not sure is relevant. You would have done
better to leave him to a Vulcan."
"Such as you?" Christine mocked.
"Exactly. But I did not come her to
argue. Only to tell you to stay away from us." Valeris stared at her for a moment, then
walked away.
Christine made her way to her apartment
trying to erase Valeris' words. She put the file into
her computer and was stunned to see the final moments of Spock's life being
played out before her. She watched it over and over again until she could recite
every word, every phrasing. "The ship…out of
danger?" "I have been…and always shall be…you friend."
She pitied Kirk. She knew how close they had been. And McCoy.
He would be grief-stricken. Saavik, Scotty, all of them.
And what about me, she wondered. Did he even
think of me at all? Then she hated herself for being so selfish. Of course he
had thought of her, but he would never have said anything to anyone else.
Perhaps if they had been bonded, she would have sensed that he thought of her
at the last, would have felt his goodbye.
She felt trapped in her apartment, in their
apartment. She walked through the rooms, looking for his things. Holding them, trying to recapture some piece of him. As she
picked up his harp she broke down. She could hear his voice singing to her, the
harp providing gentle accompaniment. His beautiful voice, in
her life, in her mind. She would never have that again. She lay on the
bed, curled around the harp and wept until she could not cry any longer.
****************************************
This was the tenor of her days; she did not
have to report to work at Starfleet right away so she took leave, hiding in her
apartment. She rarely slept. She sat often in the dark, thinking about packing
Spock's things up, then hating herself for considering it. She wept for hours
then sat motionless all emotions temporarily burned out. Her eyes were raw and
red, her throat hurt, her head throbbed. A raw, heavy pain hung over her. Many
of her friends tried to contact her, sometimes she listened as they spoke to
the recorder, other times she put the communicator on silent. She ignored the
messages that were piling up. Refused to answer the door.
She was listening when Uhura called to tell her that the
Then a priority call from Starfleet command
came in. She tried to ignore it but the computer began to alarm until she
answered it. The Genesis scientists were being called in again. She tried
calling Kirk, to see if he could give her some additional insight into what
happened, but he was off world. She tried McCoy but there was no answer either.
Scotty, Uhura, Sulu, Chekov, they were all unavailable. Odd, she thought.
The meeting was quick, they were only told
one thing. Genesis didn’t work. The experiment was a failure. The planet was
unstable. Christine watched the images sent by the science team, relayed by
Grissom. One of the scientists asked if they had more data. The briefer said
they had hoped to have more but that Grissom was apparently having technical
difficulties because they had not been able to raise her in the last hour.
Christine sat staring at the screen. Watching
the planet as it decayed before her eyes. Unstable, she thought. It was all for
nothing? Finally they were excused with another reminder that this was a dead
issue, they were never to speak of it.
As she left the briefing, her mind kept
playing the scenes of the planet, then of Spock dying, back and forth till the
planet and Spock became one in her mind. She found herself walking the halls of
Starfleet medical unsure of why she was there. She made her way to Dotura's door, knocked, heard her
friend call for her to come in. She took a step into the room, stopped. She
felt despair descend like chains around her. Dotura
took one look at her and ran to her. Moved her to a couch.
"Christine? What is it?"
The words spilled out. Disjointed and
confused. Christine tried to talk, tried
to breathe between gasping sobs. Dotura finally just
gathered her into her arms, holding her tightly, soothing her like a baby. "Shhh, shhhh. It's all right,
I'm here. You have to be strong, Christine. He'd want you to be strong."
Christine shook her head, tried to convince Dotura of something as she whispered, "You don't
understand, it's my fault. Unstable, they said unstable. He's gone. Wasn't
worth it, didn't work. He was to be my husband."
Dotura finally went to get a mild sedative. Injecting
Christine with it, she waited for it to take effect. As it did she left
Christine on the couch and went to find Zarthakh to
tell him she was going home and taking Christine with her. When she returned,
Christine was sitting numbly where she left her. Quiet except
for the sobs that wracked her body. "Come on, Christine, we're
going home now. You need to be with people who love you. And out of that
apartment, there are too many memories for you there." She helped her up
and they left the complex. Dotura took her back to
her house, gave her a stronger sedative and held her until she finally fell
asleep.
When Christine awoke many hours later, she
felt much calmer. The pain still throbbed inside her, but she was able to think
again. Deciding to check her messages, she made her way to Zarthakh's
computer and dialed in to her home system. Dotura
came out to stand with her as she was replaying them. Most of the messages were
simple condolences, but then Ambassador Sarek's voice
came over the line. He had sent a scrambled voice message.
"Christine, I do not know where you are.
I have called but you do not answer, I have stopped at your apartment but you
are never there. I had to return to Vulcan. For the Katra ceremony."
Christine felt her heart drop, so it was true. She had not been wanted there.
Sarek continued, "But something else has happened. Something
extraordinary. You need to get here, Christine. This is going to sound
unbelievable but trust me that it is true. Spock is alive."
****************************************
Christine could feel herself shaking with
fatigue as she made her way to the quarters that Spock and his family were
using while he recovered from the fal-tor-pan. She
stood for a moment at the doorway, unable to bring her hand up to push the door
chime. She was still reeling from the grief and guilt she had felt when Spock
died. Now to have him back, it was almost too much.
After getting Sarek's
call telling her of Spock's amazing return from the dead, Christine had boarded
the first available shuttle to Vulcan. She had stopped only long enough to call
Starfleet to request additional leave. There was no one else to call--everyone
else involved was already on Vulcan--Sarek, Amanda, Saavik, Valeris,
the
Forcing herself out of her reverie, Christine
rang the chimes. A few seconds later the door opened and she found herself in
Amanda's arms.
"Christine, my dear. I've been so worried about you! Sarek tried to call
you repeatedly, even made inquiries at Starfleet. Nobody knew where you had
gone. We wanted you here for the ceremony." Amanda led her out of the
entry way and into a small sitting room.
"Saavik said there was to be no
ceremony?"
Amanda nodded, "Yes, initially that is
what we all thought. We believed Spock's katra to be lost. But Sarek discovered
otherwise and he came back here to prepare. You know how fond of you he is,
Christine. He would never have excluded you from this."
"Valeris
said…"
Amanda's smile was bitter, "Valeris says many things, Christine. Most of them designed
to benefit Valeris. You are most welcome here, you
should know that."
Christine felt a piece of the darkness that
had surrounded her lifting. "Can I see him, Amanda?"
Amanda looked concerned, took Christine's
hands in hers. "Oh my dear, you've come so far and I have to tell you that
Spock isn't quite…"
"Isn't quite what?" Christine
prompted.
"He isn't the same. The ritual restored
his katra to his body. He is alive. But he does not remember much yet. He is
learning and I think over time he will become more like he was. But, Christine,
he is different." She watched as Christine digested her words. "I
couldn't have you walking in there not knowing. I've come to love you, my dear.
I just wanted you to know."
"I want to see him, Amanda. I've come
all this way to see him." Christine felt dizzy as she rose to follow
Amanda to find Spock. I have to get hold of myself, she thought frantically. I
have to be strong, cannot collapse now. She tried to will the sick feeling
away, but she could not.
As she entered the next room, Christine was
surprised to see Saavik and Sarek sitting waiting for her. Saavik rose from her
chair and wrapped her in a warm embrace. "Christine, you should have been
here with us. Where were you?"
Christine looked at Sarek, "I was
overwhelmed by all that happened. A friend took me back to her house, to get me
away from the memories. I didn't know you had contacted me. I didn't think…"
"Didn't think you belonged here?" A
new voice interjected. Christine turned to see Valeris
standing with Spock. The young woman's face betrayed none of the spite that her
words had conveyed.
"Valeris…"
Amanda warned her.
Christine turned to Spock. Her heart was
beating so hard she thought he must be able to hear it from where he stood.
"Spock?" she asked tentatively.
He looked at her as if trying to remember. Oh
god, she realized. He doesn't know me. Christine felt pain flood her, and the
emptiness that Spock's return had begun to banish encompassed her again.
"Spock?" her voice came out as a plea, scared and hopeless.
He stepped closer, cocked his head to the
side as he studied her. "You are Christine Chapel. We served together?"
"Spock, you lived together!" Saavik
reminded him.
He was silent as he thought this over.
"We lived together?" Christine nodded. "As mates?" he
continued. She nodded again. He seemed to remember as he continued, "But
we are not mates. Why?"
"Because she left you," Valeris offered. "To go work on
Genesis."
Saavik whirled on her. 'How do you know that?
All information on that is classified."
Valeris met her gaze coolly, "I was passing in the hall
when you and Sarek were discussing the details of this project. I cannot help that the walls are thin
here."
Spock looked intently at Christine. "You
worked on Genesis, yes I remember now."
"Spock, I feel so guilty about that, to
have worked on the project that ultimately caused your death. That will haunt me
forever."
Sarek moved next to her. "You can not be
blamed for what happened, Christine. I am sure in time you and Spock will make
peace with the havoc Genesis caused in your lives."
"Sir, I think you are too
charitable," Valeris again interjected herself
into the conversation. "Christine has only herself to blame if Genesis
destroyed her life. Am I not right?"
Christine stared at her. "I'm not sure I
know what you mean?"
"Oh come now, isn't it true that you
have a lot more to be haunted by than just some indirect involvement? Didn't
you work almost exclusively with the part of the project that David Marcus
oversaw?"
Saavik looked shocked. "Valeris, you are making this up. You couldn't possibly know
that."
Valeris continued, her malice as
smooth as silk. "I should think that how I know this would be less
important than whether it is true. Christine, you worked with David Marcus, did
you not? And you knew what he was doing, how he used protomatter
to make Genesis work? Will you stand there and lie to all of us?"
Christine felt panic, but also relief, that
finally this could be spoken of, "It's true. I did work with David. And I knew.
I was the only other person there that knew."
"Why?" It was Spock, his voice
confused, betrayed. "Protomatter?
It is accepted as anathema to ethical scientific experimentation. Why?"
Saavik looked stunned. "Christine, you
had to have a reason, a good one, to do this?"
Suddenly tired beyond her capacity to stand
it, Christine slumped into the nearest chair. "David and I were working on
phase 2, the Genesis cave. We had everything ready. The formulas were tested
and retested. We would set off the device and it would work…for a while. But
then it would stop. The matrix was too stable, you see, it had an intrinsic
urge to return to equilibrium. Every time it did this, the Genesis Effect would
be arrested. We tried over and over," she stopped at Saavik's
questioning sound.
"But I saw the Genesis cave. It was
perfect."
Christine sighed. "You saw the last
Genesis cave. Regula is now riddled with caves, most
of them in states you wouldn't want to see. David and I were getting desperate.
We were so close. And we were coming up on our deadline to finish this stage in
order to qualify for continued funding. We thought that if we could add an
unstable element to the matrix, just enough to keep the Effect dynamic until we
halted it, that it would be the answer we needed. And we found that only protomatter was inherently unpredictable enough to keep the
process going. We tested it in the
"But the planet, I was there, it was not
perfect, Christine. It was so unstable that it destroyed itself."
"I know. I was fully briefed on what
happened."
"And were you fully briefed on the
impact of your actions?" Valeris queried her
calmly. "Had you not used protomatter, the
Genesis device would not have been ready for Khan to use. In fact, he might not
have wanted it at all had it been in a non-operational state. It is likely that
Spock would not have died. The enterprise would not have been destroyed. And
David Marcus would still be alive." She turned to Spock, "Is my train
of logic complete, Captain Spock?"
"Impeccably complete, Valeris." Spock turned to Christine. "I still do
not understand why you chose to ignore the ethical bans on protomatter?"
"I was blinded by the research, by the
possibilities of that research. David and I, everyone on Genesis, believed that
the project would benefit the entire federation. David and I thought that it
was worth the risk."
"And David Marcus paid for that
miscalculation with his life." Valeris stalked
over to stand in front of Christine. "I wonder what Starfleet would do
with you, if they knew of your involvement?" She cocked an eyebrow at
Christine.
"Her involvement will not be mentioned, Valeris." Sarek surprised them all by the sternness of
his tone. "She made a grave mistake, but what she did was not against
regulations. Starfleet censure is unnecessary when I am sure that Christine has
already punished herself and will continue to do so. We will not speak of this
again. Is that understood?" He singled out Valeris
with his look. "Is it?" They all nodded.
Amanda broke her silence, "I think it is
time to leave Spock and Christine alone." Sarek and Saavik left the room,
but Valeris continued to stand over Christine. "Valeris, that means you."
"We will continue our lessons, Captain
Spock. When you are finished?" Valeris glanced
at Christine, a calculating glint in her eyes. "I'm working with him to
restore his memory. I think it has brought us closer, spending so much time
together. Good bye Christine." She turned on her heel and walked out,
followed closely by a watchful Amanda.
Spock took a seat across from Christine.
"I am not the man that I was. I have the memories, but they are
distant." He looked at her in a way that made her want to run out of the
room. His eyes gave nothing back. His body was rigid. She looked down at her
lap, unwilling to see the emptiness in his gaze. "I do remember you. I can
recall things that we said…and did." She looked up suddenly, wondering if
he might remember how he had felt. There was still nothing in his expression.
He rose, clearly uncomfortable with her.
"My parents and Saavik tell me that I was going to bond with you."
She laughed bitterly, "What does Valeris have to say about that?"
He frowned slightly. "She says I did not
bond with you because I wanted a Vulcan wife. I do not remember thinking that.
I do remember telling you that 'my love would endure' and I believe that this
indicated a promise on my part. Once I am fully recovered from the refusion, we can bond." He sat back down, looking
relieved to be finished with the subject.
Christine looked at him shocked. "You
want to bond? Spock, do you love me?"
He looked at her quizzically, "The
question is not logical. I made a promise to you. And I will keep it."
"It may not be a logical question,
Spock, but it is the only question. Do you love me?"
He took a deep breath as he thought. "I
remember loving you. Perhaps that can be enough?"
Christine felt despair wash over her, then
numbness enveloped her. "No, it can never be enough. The only thing that
would be enough would be what we had, before all this." She looked down
again. "I had everything I wanted.
But I walked away from you. And then I cheated on Genesis. I have had a hand in
everything that has happened. This then is my punishment."
She rose slowly, moved to the door. "Valeris is no doubt correct, Spock. You should take a
Vulcan wife. It would be the logical thing to do." He cocked an eyebrow
but did not respond. She stood looking at him for a long moment, trying to find
the man she had loved, the man she had lost. She saw only a familiar stranger.
She straightened her back, pulled together
the last shreds of self-control. Her voice was far from steady as she intoned
the ritual farewell, "Live long and prosper, Spock."
He rose, nodded. "Live long and prosper,
Dr. Chapel."
FIN