DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek characters
are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc and
Viacom. The story contents are the creation and property of Djinn and are
copyright (c) 2012 by Djinn. This story is Rated R.
Nobody Knows Me Like You
Do
by Djinn
Chapel
sat in the bar on spacedock, watching as the techs
floated around the Enterprise,
assessing the post-VÕger damage. She sipped her wine, trying to figure
out if she was going to stay with the ship now that Kirk had made her demotion
to deputy permanent.
Deputy
CMO on the flagship was still a coup right after graduating med school, and she
knew that. She just had a huge
sense of Òbeen there, done that, got the goddamned t-shirt.Ó Would she never get free of this part of
her life? Kirk? Len? And now Spock. The everlasting trinity, who were not
supposed to be part of this joyride. SheÕd signed on to be with her friends,
with the other members of the crew
sheÕd served with, not with the big three.
TheyÕd
been safely gone. Why hadnÕt they
stayed that way?
ÒThis
seat taken?Ó A soft
southern voice. Softer than sheÕd heard it during the crisis with VÕger.
She
looked up and studied Len, before saying, ÒIÕm not sure. IÕm thinking about things. Important things.Ó
ÒI
know you are. And I know what
about. Now, can I sit?Ó
She
shrugged and then nodded.
He
pulled the chair out and sat. She
saw he had a drink already—bourbon, no doubt.
He
looked out at the ship, his eyes betraying nothing. ÒI never wanted to be back here. You know that, right?Ó
ÒI
know. He shanghaied you. IÕve heard this version.Ó
ÒVersion?Ó He turned back, his eyes hard.
ÒYou
accepted the post again. Shanghaied
doesnÕt play well when you make the servitude permanent by choice.Ó
His
eyes widened slightly, the way they did when he was surprised. ÒYou speak your mind a bit differently
than you used to.Ó
ÒMaybe
thatÕs because weÕre peers now. Or
are you going to tell me weÕre not?Ó
ÒWe
are peers, Christine. YouÕre a
doctor.Ó
ÒAnd
all I hear you tell Kirk is you need your goddamn nurse back.Ó She finished the wine she had left in
one big swallow.
He
waved the server over. ÒThe lady
will have a refill.Ó He looked at
Chapel. ÒYou still drinking that
fancy dry Riesling?Ó
ÒYes.Ó
The
server didnÕt ask what kind since they only served one, just nodded and left.
ÒI
donÕt want my nurse back. I have
plenty of nurses. I just want back the
Christine I could talk to.Ó
She
looked out the window. ÒYou mean
the one you could talk at.Ó
ÒWhatÕs
that supposed to mean?Ó
ÒI
was never your friend.Ó She could
feel her mouth turning down, the bitterness rising in her eyes. ÒThe way you used to ride me about
Spock.Ó
This
time it was he who threw his drink back.
When the server came with her wine, he told her to bring him back a
double. ÒAnd you wasted no time in
making it known you were happy to see him when he showed up this time.Ó
ÒYou
are so right. I wonÕt stop you if
you want to give me shit for that.
IÕve already given myself a raft of it.Ó
He
smiled. ÒThen I donÕt need to if
youÕve finally started doing it.Ó
He leaned forward, waited as the server set down his drink and left,
then said gently, ÒAnd I havenÕt been giving you shit this time. Maybe you havenÕt noticed?Ó
ÒI
noticed. Figured you thought you
couldnÕt do to a colleague what you did to a subordinate.Ó
ÒWell,
that would make me a real asshole, wouldnÕt it?Ó His mouth got very tight. ÒMaybe I just didnÕt want to get you
upset when youÕd already had several bad hits. DeckerÕs death and being
demoted—with me coming back.
I canÕt imagine I was your first choice for boss for life?Ó
She
laughed. ÒIÕve had worse.Ó
ÒOh,
yeah, compare me to Korby. ThatÕs
sweet.Ó He leaned back. ÒI came here to say one thing and IÕve
managed to screw it up, so IÕm just going to say it. And IÕve never said it before because it
never seemed the right time, but IÕm afraid youÕre going to leave, so now is
the only time.Ó
He
fell silent.
She
waited, and then she started to laugh.
ÒDid I miss the part where you say this thing you are going to say?Ó
ÒNo,
damn it all, IÕm working up to it.Ó
He took a quick sip. ÒDonÕt
go. DonÕt leave the ship.Ó
ÒDonÕt...thatÕs
all you have? ThatÕs your big
statement?Ó
He
took another sip, and not a quick one.
ÒThatÕs just the intro.Ó
ÒOh.Ó She sighed. ÒLen, I—Ó
ÒLet
me finish, woman.Ó He took a deep
breath. ÒI rode you the way I did
about Spock because I wanted you.
And I was too damn dumb to simply tell you, and you either didnÕt care
or couldnÕt see it—or both.Ó
He exhaled as if heÕd just run a marathon, then
took another deep breath. ÒAnd...thatÕs why I donÕt want you to
go. I know SpockÕs back and you
think maybe...but I think maybe, too.
So...donÕt go.Ó
She
stared at him.
ÒWell,
say something, damn it.Ó
ÒYou
wanted me?Ó
ÒYes.Ó
ÒYou
were so mean to me.Ó
ÒWell,
thatÕs how little boys are, Christine.
They pick on the girls they like.
YouÕve accused me of never growing up before. Why would I start with how I handle
relationships?Ó He closed his eyes. ÒThis went better in my head.Ó
She
smiled.
ÒAre
you even interested? Just shoot an
old dog if you really donÕt give a damn.Ó
ÒYouÕre
my boss.Ó
He
laughed out loud. ÒBecause everyone
knows youÕve got a problem with that.Ó
She
wanted to hit him but settled for laughing. How could she not when it was true?
ÒHave
you really never considered it?Ó He
met her eyes. ÒIs Spock all you can
see?Ó
She
didnÕt answer at first, but then said softly, ÒWhen you were sick. I thought about it then.Ó
ÒIÕve
never forgotten what you said to me.
ÔA lot can happen in a year.Õ
It never did for us. Not in
one. Not in five.Ó He reached over, touched her hand for a
moment then pulled back. ÒIÕm
asking for that year now. You said
to give myself every minute of it.
I want to do it now. With
you.Ó He frowned at the same moment
she did. ÒOnly that sounded creepy
because we need to build into this, I realize—I donÕt mean I want to
smother you.Ó
She
smiled.
ÒYou
finding all this funny, Doctor?Ó
ÒNo.Ó
ÒYou
wouldnÕt happen to be finding it charming and oh-so appealing, would you?Ó He gave her a very hopeful look that she
suddenly did find more than a little charming. SheÕd never seen him so...vulnerable
with her.
ÒMaybe.Ó
ÒMaybe? Well, hallelujah. ThatÕs much better than the ÔHell, noÕ I
was expecting.Ó He grinned at
her. ÒSo youÕll stay?Ó
She
looked out at the ship again.
He
followed her gaze. ÒYou can leave
any time if itÕs not working, you know that. With your credentials, people will be
fighting over you. You know that,
too. And no one will question why
you left, not with Jim pulling a boneheaded stunt like reinstating me.Ó
She
turned back to him. ÒIÕll
stay. And...I
donÕt want to chase Spock. I donÕt
want to be that woman. But...this thing with us. I donÕt know about it. You and I have a history that isnÕt
always pleasant for me. I like this
conversation weÕre having. IÕve
learned more in this conversation than in five years with you, I think. More things that matter, if you get me?Ó
ÒOh,
I get you.Ó He held up his
glass. ÒTaking it slow is not a
problem for me. It is a southern
tradition to court a lady. IÕm
perfectly all right with upholding that fine practice.Ó
She
smiled. It had been a long time
since anyone had wooed her. Much
less this man, whoÕd so often annoyed the crap out of
her.
Might
be nice.
And
if it wasnÕt, she could always leave.
SheÕd already received several notes from high-ranking officers asking
if she was staying on KirkÕs ship now that Will was gone. Len wasnÕt wrong: she had options.
##
It was strange, McCoy couldnÕt deny that. Working with Christine and having
permission—her
permission—to want her. To pursue her.
It was strange but wonderful.
In a terrifying way.
HeÕd never been so afraid he was going to fuck something up in his
entire life.
He
had a feeling Christine was wondering when the courting was going to begin. Right now, he was just trying to let
himself get used to the idea that he had her consent to chase. Which would get him in a better frame of
mind to do this the right way, not some half-assed way that would leave her
feeling like she got gypped.
He
knew he had a lot to make up for.
He also knew that Spock still loomed large in her mind, no matter what
she said she did or didnÕt want to do about him. If McCoy wanted her for himself, he had
to make her forget every other man.
His track record on this with other women was not stellar. Hence, his caution.
But
what he was doing, and he thought Christine was noticing this, was letting her
in professionally. Not just as a
woman he wanted, but as a colleague and, more
importantly, as his partner, his deputy.
Talking to her not at her, asking her opinion rather than
giving orders. It wasnÕt hard. She was as smart as he was, if not
smarter, and they both knew it. She
just lacked experience.
And
the more he included her, the more she seemed to settle into the job, into the
routine, into just being on this ship again. And that was his first goal. Get leaving out of her mind.
He
saw Jim come into sickbay, saw him stop to talk to Christine and narrowed his
eyes. He wasnÕt going to exclude
the idea of anyone being a possible rival, and JimÕs best hunting ground, if he
did decide to mess in his nest, was medical. And Christine was just his type.
And
McCoy had shared nothing of what was going on. HeÕd never told Jim about how he felt
for Christine. Had always felt like
a silly teenager harboring this desire for his head nurse, when here he was
older than his friend.
Jim
turned and walked back to McCoyÕs office.
He grinned and said, ÒYou really are a miracle worker, Bones. I got a smile from Chapel today.Ó
ÒJust
trying to make her feel like a demotion isnÕt the end of the world.Ó
ÒWell,
I certainly donÕt mind mine.Ó Jim
sat. ÒYou okay? YouÕve been quiet lately.Ó
ÒFine.
Just...getting
used to being on this deathtrap.
One you had no hand in refitting, which makes me nervous to no end.Ó
Kirk
laughed. ÒSame old Bones.Ó
ÒDid
you expect any different?Ó
ÒYou
being you is one of the cornerstones of my
security.Ó His smile faded. ÒBut Spock being Spock is, too, and heÕs
not really himself yet. How long do
you think this emotionalism is going to keep up?Ó
McCoy
was wondering that himself. He had
Spock in for more check-ups than Spock believed were necessary. But he wanted to observe the progress
for himself and also see how Spock acted around Christine.
Keep
your friends close and your romantic rivals
closer. At least
until you secured fair lady.
ÒHeÕs getting better, Jim.Ó
ÒNot
fast enough for my taste.Ó
ÒYou
go meld with a big damn killing machine.
Then tell me how fast you get better.Ó
Jim
smiled. ÒGood point.Ó He rubbed his eyes. ÒI just want things back to normal.Ó
ÒYou
mean you want them the way they were.
They wonÕt ever be the way they were.Ó
A
frown was his answer. ÒIs that
pessimism or a pep talk?Ó
ÒBoth. You got your ship back, but sheÕs not
the same ship. Accept that. You got Spock and me back, but weÕre not
the same people we were when we served with you last. Spock, especially. Give it time. YouÕre where you should be. ItÕs just different.Ó
ÒWise
as ever. That seems the same.Ó Jim sighed, then
he got up. ÒThank you, Doctor. As always, you have earned your pay for
the day.Ó
ÒThen
the rest of my shift will be cake.Ó
He grinned and watched Jim walk out, glad to see he didnÕt stop to say
goodbye to Christine.
##
Chapel
carried a dinner tray to the lab, smiling as she passed crewmen she knew and
those sheÕd only briefly met in sickbay when theyÕd processed onto the
ship. She turned into the lab,
waited as the doors opened—these werenÕt as responsive as they should
be. Something else to report that
wasnÕt up to par yet.
Then
she walked in and set the tray in front of Len. ÒI realize the captain needs these
results yesterday, but you already skipped lunch. And I know you. You wonÕt take a break to go get this.Ó
He
smiled up at her. ÒThank you.Ó
She
nodded and walked back to the door.
ÒChristine.Ó
She
turned, saw he was watching her, his eyes very
gentle. ÒYes?Ó
ÒMy
results will be a while. Come sit
with me while I eat. Talk to
me. IÕm tired of being alone with
my brain and this microscope.Ó
She smiled, studied the table he was at.
There were any number of stools to pick. Then she saw him put his foot on the one
next to him and slide it out.
She
looked around. The lab was
empty. What the hell?
She
walked back to him and sat down.
And was instantly aware of how this was not the stool she would have chosen. In the empty lab, she seemed to be
almost in his lap.
He
turned and started to eat, handing her a padd. ÒDoes any of this look promising to
you?Ó
She
smiled that he thought she could just look at what heÕd done and know if it was
working. She could, but she usually
didnÕt think he thought she could.
ÒTest four-b and six-a both look good.Ó
ÒThatÕs
how IÕm leaning, too.Ó He
sighed. ÒThis is great. Thank you. I didnÕt realize how hungry I was.Ó He looked over at her. ÒI used to be jealous when youÕd bring
Spock food.Ó
ÒI
only did it the one time. Other
than when he was under medical confinement or in sickbay, but I did that for
everyone.Ó
ÒTrue. But the one time stands out.Ó
ÒOnly
because I nearly ended up wearing the soup.Ó
ÒAlso
true.Ó He looked down. ÒDid you make him more?Ó
ÒWhy
do you ask?Ó
ÒJust
a hunch.Ó
ÒYeah,
I did.Ó
ÒDid
he like it?Ó
ÒHe
never really said.Ó She looked
down. ÒThat was a strange time.Ó
ÒOn
that we can agree.Ó He reached
over, took her hand and gave it a squeeze before letting it go. ÒSorry, didnÕt mean to bring up bad
memories.Ó
ÒWell,
theyÕre our memories, arenÕt they?
We canÕt sweep them under the rug.Ó
ÒNo,
I guess we canÕt.Ó
ÒYour
actions make more sense. I
mean...if you were jealous.Ó
ÒI
was. As seething green as that
blasted soup.Ó He grinned.
She
laughed, glad to see he could be light about
this. ÒI get that. I certainly had my moments being
jealous.Ó
ÒOf
Spock and his bevy of beauties?Ó
ÒI
was actually thinking of Natira.Ó She looked down. ÒThat was a hard time. I really did think about you. What you meant to me. What I probably didnÕt mean to you. It was...strange. I didnÕt let myself think about that
again, Len. I just put it out of my
head. Told myself it was that you
were dying that made my mind and heart go all the wrong places.Ó
ÒNo,
they went the right places. But I
canÕt regret you didnÕt say anything.
IÕd be dead now if we hadnÕt found that Fabrini
book with the cure for xenopolycythemia.Ó
ÒTrue
enough. Everything happens for a
reason, I guess.Ó
ÒMaybe
so.Ó
The
lab door opened and another couple walked in. She started to get up, but felt LenÕs
hand on her thigh. ÒLet people get
used to this. What difference does
it make? WeÕre just talking.Ó
She
settled back down. ÒItÕs just weÕre
sitting very close.Ó
ÒWeÕve
stood closer when weÕve been working.
You just need something to eat so you donÕt feel so conspicuous.Ó He handed her one of the cookies sheÕd
loaded up on his plate. It was her
favorite kind, a snickerdoodle. ÒThatÕll make it all better. And I donÕt even like those, so donÕt
tell me you didnÕt pick that for yourself anyway.Ó
She
smiled. ÒMaybe IÕm trying to expand
your horizons?Ó
ÒWell,
thatÕs entirely possible. YouÕre
not afraid to take on impossible projects.Ó He grinned at her and went back to
eating.
She
picked the padd up, scrolled back so she could see how heÕd started. ÒMaybe if this batch doesnÕt work, try
some Em-4 solution as a stabilizer.
IÕve found that it can get rid of impurities other things wonÕt even
find.Ó
ÒIÕll
try that. Good tip. Thanks.Ó He sounded open, not at all
patronizing. ÒWhat about Carbolimix. I
keep seeing it written up, but so far IÕm not having much luck with it being a
miracle addition to anything.Ó
ÒMarketing
hype that everyone has bought into.
YouÕre right, as usual. They
should have you field test things before they allow Starfleet Medical to buy
anything.Ó She bumped shoulders
with him.
ÒWe
could charge a fee. Hell, we could
cash out and open our own product-testing business.Ó
She
laughed. Then her communicator went
off. ÒOh, crap.Ó
ÒTrouble?Ó
ÒI
was supposed to meet Ny and Jan for drinks. Not linger here after dropping off your
dinner tray.Ó
ÒDid
they know you were dropping off my dinner tray?Ó His voice dipped into an interesting
register.
She
shook her head.
ÒDo
they know IÕm pursuing you? Or that
youÕre letting me?Ó
ÒWell,
technically, since the most action weÕve seen is me bringing you dinner, they
might interpret it more as me once again setting my sights on a man who doesnÕt
know IÕm alive. But no, they donÕt
know.Ó
ÒTheyÕd
be wrong in that assessment.Ó Len
glanced back at the other couple, then reached over and touched her hand,
letting his linger, his fingers doing something to her palm that was making her
suddenly very aware of him and how intently he was staring at her with his blue
eyes. ÒI most definitely know you
are alive.Ó
Her
communicator buzzed again. She
exhaled slowly, pulled her hand away.
ÒI have to go.Ó
ÒI
know you do. Thank you for looking
out for me.Ó He picked up the
padd. ÒAnd for the tips.Ó
ÒSure.Ó She took a deep breath before getting up
and walking to the door. She did
not look back as she walked out, even though she really wanted to.
##
McCoy
saw Christine in her office and her coffee mug by the coffee maker, which had
just finished brewing. He poured
her a cup, fixed it the way he knew she liked it with more milk and sugar than
was medically advised, and took it in to her.
ÒYouÕre
working late,Ó he said, as he set the coffee down on the coaster she kept near
her terminal.
ÒEvals. Funny
how the deputy gets stuck doing most of them.Ó
He
smiled. ÒAlways been that way. Just ask MÕBenga.Ó He sat down in one of her desk chairs
rather than perching on her desk like he normally did.
ÒYouÕre
doing mine, though?Ó
ÒYep. I did yours before. Me wanting you wonÕt change how I
evaluate you. YouÕll get a fair
rating. You always have.Ó
She
took a sip of her coffee, smiled at him and he knew heÕd made it to her
liking. ÒHow did I not know you
wanted me?Ó
ÒYou
didnÕt care?Ó
ÒNo. Care or not, a woman usually can tell.Ó
ÒIÕm
a surly SOB adept at hiding his feelings under coats of nasty sarcasm? I probably worked so hard to not make you
uncomfortable that I hurt you worse with all the smokescreens.Ó
She
nodded and looked surprised heÕd admit it.
ÒHey,
IÕm at least IÕm a self-aware, surly SOB.Ó
She
laughed. ÒIf you want me so bad,
why havenÕt you asked me to dinner yet?Ó
ÒDo
not question the great method of southern courting, my dear. You still have leaving on your mind?Ó
She
shook her head.
ÒWell,
then, clearly, I am doing something right.Ó He grinned as if he hadnÕt a care in the
world, but she had no idea how hard it was for him to put on the brakes and
take it this slow. Had no idea how
much time he spent thinking about her in his quarters—or what he was
doing when he was thinking about her.
He wanted her—heÕd wanted her for years, but he knew his problem
was rushing things. For some
reason, heÕd never rushed things with her and he wasnÕt going to start
now. Especially
not with Spock around.
It
wasnÕt enough that Christine was open to him. She had to want him. She had to want only him. When he
finally made love to her, he wanted it to be because she couldnÕt stand it if
he didnÕt.
He
wasnÕt sure theyÕd ever get there.
But he was a pathetic enough old romantic at this point in his life for
him to need them to get there. Or
heÕd pass.
God
help him, heÕd pass.
She
turned back to the screen, moaned softly and rubbed her neck.
He
got up, said, ÒHere, let me.Ó HeÕd
never really treated her to one of his neck massages. Had been afraid heÕd telegraph what he
wanted if he did. He felt along her
shoulders, found the spot immediately that was knotted and went to work on it,
kneading it as she let out the soft exhalation he knew meant relief.
ÒYouÕre
a god,Ó she murmured, her voice almost unbearably sexy.
ÒYes,
yes, I am. The epiphany has come to
you late in life, my child, but it has at last come.Ó
She
laughed and her back shook under his hands, making him grin. He moved to her neck; this was the part
that would be more sensual, less therapeutic. He heard her inhale suddenly as he made
slow deep circles around her neck, working his way to the sides of her throat. He smiled when he saw that she liked
this. She liked how he touched
her. He could tell by the way she
was pushing back gently, the way sheÕd gone still under his hands, still and
almost boneless.
ÒYou
alive?Ó
ÒMmm hmmmm.Ó
ÒWelcome
to the Church of McCoy.Ó
ÒNice
place youÕve got here.Ó
He
could hear the smile in her voice, and it made him work even harder as he slid
his fingers up under her hairline, massaging just a little more and then
stopping. He patted her shoulders,
said, ÒThere you go, kiddo,Ó and walked out.
He
heard a small groan from her—a complaint because heÕd finished too
soon. Then her calling, ÒThank
you.Ó
ÒYou
bet. Now, get those evals done, Chapel.Ó
He knew he was smirking as he walked back to his office.
First
rule of courtship: leave them wanting more.
##
Chapel
sat at the bar in the rec lounge with Ny and
Jan. They were facing out, leaning
back against the bar, checking out the impromptu limbo contest that had erupted
as part of the Caribbean Night party.
None of them had dressed up, but others had, many in skimpy little
bikini tops.
ÒDoes
it make us officially old if weÕre sitting here wearing things that actually
cover our boobs and asses?Ó Jan asked in a
philosopherÕs tone before she took a long hit off her beer.
ÒI
think so, yes,Ó Uhura said. She
shrugged. ÒDonÕt care. IÕm long past the days where IÕm going
to subject this rear end or the girls to trying to get under a limbo rod
wearing nothing but triangles and some string.Ó She held her martini glass up to the
bartender. ÒAnother?Ó
Chapel
saw Len come in with Kirk. Now that
she knew what to look for, she saw the way LenÕs expression changed when he saw
her, but it was subtle. He was good
at hiding what he felt, and she doubted that either of her friends had noticed
a thing.
ÒLadies,Ó
Kirk said as he and Len walked up to them.
ÒI see the party is in full swing.Ó
He took in the limbo scene.
ÒAm I getting old or are there less clothes this year?Ó
ÒWe
noticed that, too.Ó Jan smiled at
him. ÒYou still dance with anyone
who asks?Ó
He
nodded with a grin.
ÒWell,
if they ever put dance music on instead of this marimba crap, I get first
dibs.Ó
ÒYour
tactics have changed since you went to transporter school.Ó
ÒWe
were taught to be direct. Saves
time and lives.Ó
Kirk
laughed. ÒFirst dance is yours,
then.Ó With a grin, he moved down
the bar and ordered a drink.
ÒIs
your first dance taken, Doctor?Ó
LenÕs voice was as casual as ever.
ÒI
donÕt believe so.Ó
ÒMay
I pencil my name in on your nonexistent dance card?Ó He made a face as if in offense that the
time-honored tradition had been ignored at this party.
ÒI
donÕt see a line waiting to dance with me.Ó
He
frowned. ÒThatÕs the wrong answer.Ó
She
realized there was a bite to his voice, saw something
in his eyes that told her to try again.
ÒYou may pencil your name in, sir.Ó
ÒMuch better.Ó He smiled, the
hurt—or whatever it had been—gone. ÒIf this marimba crap ever goes away.Ó
ÒAnd
there is no guarantee of that,Ó Ny said, proving she
was listening in to everything, as Chapel always took for granted. Hazard of palling
around with a communications officer.
Len
walked down to where Kirk was sitting, and Chapel waited to see if Ny would have any further comment, but she didnÕt. Not for Chapel anyway, but she did turn
to Jan and say, ÒGood job, you.
Grew a pair?Ó
ÒDidnÕt
have a choice. Transporter school
wasnÕt easy.Ó She shook her head as
she watched more people show up and join the limbo line. ÒYou know this marimba shit is not going
to end. Or itÕs just going to turn
into a big conga line.Ó
Ny and Chapel nodded.
TheyÕd seen it happen before.
And
it happened again. A few hours later,
Chapel gave up, left Jan and Ny at the bar, and
walked over to where Len was sitting with Kirk and Scott, whoÕd come in
late.
ÒNext
time,Ó Len said softly as she smiled and said ÒGood night.Ó
##
ÒSo
what was that?Ó Jim asked at breakfast the next day.
McCoy
busied himself with putting hot sauce on his omelette. ÒWhat was what?Ó
ÒNext
time. You said—actually sort
of purred it—to Christine.Ó
ÒOh. Just a dance. Guess she got the idea from RandÕs
ballsy cornering of you.Ó He
grinned.
ÒShe
didnÕt ask you. You asked her. I saw you do it while I was ordering my
drink. WhatÕs going on?Ó
McCoy
took a nice big bite of egg to give himself time to
think. This was his friend. He could trust him. But did he want to?
Jim
waited, his eyes narrowed.
ÒI
like her,Ó McCoy finally said when heÕd finished chewing. ÒI always have. There. There it is.Ó
ÒReally? Always?Ó
ÒYeah.Ó
ÒLike
as in like to go to lunch with or like as in why wonÕt she do me this minute?Ó
ÒThe
latter, Jim.Ó He took another bite
of egg. Maybe honesty had been the
wrong way to go.
ÒAhhhhh. That
explains a lot, actually. How you
treated her. How you treated Spock. How you never treated me that way.Ó He nodded. ÒMust have driven you nuts, seeing her
chase him.Ó
ÒWasnÕt
fun—IÕll admit.Ó He shrugged. ÒI didnÕt always handle it the best way
known to man.Ó
Jim
laughed. ÒUh, no. But sheÕs still talking to you—and
working with you—so clearly sheÕs a forgiving sort. I take it youÕve made it known to her
that you fancy her?Ó
ÒOh,
yes.Ó McCoy let out a breath he
hadnÕt realized heÕd been holding. God damn, it was a relief to just say it. To tell his best friend that he was
interested in Christine.
ÒDoes
she return the feelings?Ó
ÒNot
yet.Ó
Jim waited, his eyes full of something McCoy didnÕt really like. Pity, maybe?
ÒI
know. I know. Maybe not ever. SpockÕs still around. Is he...interested in her? After VÕger, I
mean? I keep trying to tell, but he
has that poker face down.Ó
Jim
smiled. ÒI havenÕt noticed any
interest in her direction.Ó
ÒBut
he can go one way when you think heÕs going to go another.Ó
ÒYeah,
he can.Ó Jim leaned forward. ÒHow are you playing this?Ó
ÒVery
carefully. I donÕt actually want my
heart broken again. It was hard
enough to get over my divorce. And
I was young then. More easily
mended.Ó
ÒI
remember. ThatÕs why I asked.Ó He smiled. ÒFor what itÕs worth, she looked
interested last night. And I have a
reputation at being somewhat good at this.Ó He grinned wider.
ÒShe
did look a little disappointed that we werenÕt going to get a dance.Ó McCoy smiled. ÒWeÕll see how this goes. However it turns out, sickbayÕs a lot
nicer place now that weÕre being more...honest with each other. Or IÕm being more honest anyway.Ó He smiled. ÒSheÕs staying put for now, which is
what I wanted. I assume thatÕs what
you wanted? I never asked you
before I started my campaign to get her not to leave.Ó
ÒYouÕre
fine. I wanted her to stay. I just wanted her to stop glaring at
me.Ó Jim laughed, that silly,
self-deprecating laugh that McCoy loved.
ÒShe can be daunting.Ó
ÒYou
have no idea.Ó
##
Chapel
walked into her office, saw a white flower lying on her desk. It had a note next to it that said,
ÒHandle with care. Lots of thorns. Not
unlike the sender.Ó
She
laughed, picked it up very gingerly, and sniffed. A lovely clove-like scent filled her
head. ÒMmmm.Ó
ÒItÕs
a Cherokee Rose. The state flower
of Georgia.Ó Len stood at the
door. ÒThe thorns are the devil.Ó
ÒArenÕt
they always.Ó
ÒWell,
whatÕs something nice without a little work?Ó
ÒUmm,
something nice.Ó She laughed as she
waited for him to come up with a snappy reply, but he seemed fresh out. ÒThey should make a perfume of it.Ó
ÒYou
can find it in some smaller shops in Savannah. ItÕs expensive.Ó
ÒItÕd
be worth it. This is
exquisite. Thank you.Ó
He
moved over to her desk, stood next to her.
ÒItÕs more than just a pretty gift.
ItÕs an invitation to dinner.
WeÕll be back at Command next week.
ThereÕs an amazing restaurant in Savannah, if youÕre free?Ó
SheÕd
tentatively said sheÕd go to the beach with Ny and
Jan, but, ÒI could make myself free.Ó
ÒThatÕs
a much better answer than the one I got for our dance that never was.Ó He pulled a small stand from behind some
books on her desk and set the flower into it. ÒThis will keep it fresh for days. Special mixture at the bottom keeps it
fed and watered.Ó
ÒYou
went to a lot of work.Ó
ÒOh,
IÕm sorry, are you not worth a lot of work?Ó He let his eyebrow go up.
She
conceded his question with a slight head nod.
ÒBut
yes, I did go to a lot of work, Christine.
That is one of the tenets of courtship.Ó He laid his hand on her shoulder, and
she reached up and covered it with her own.
Something
changed in his eyes when she did it.
It was as if, for just a moment, the man with all the defenses was
gone.
ÒYou
are worth it, as far as IÕm concerned.Ó
ÒGlad
to hear it.Ó
ÒBut
pampering goes both ways.Ó
She
let go of his hand. ÒAnd what do I
need to do for you?Ó This should be
good. Would it involve peeling
grapes or something even more extreme?
ÒWill
you do the weekly report? IÕve been
swamped with this after-action thing from the dust-up Jim got us into
yesterday.Ó
ÒThe
weekly report is due tonight.Ó She
rolled her eyes. Then she smiled
and handed him a padd. ÒI knew you
were busy. I went ahead and just
did it.Ó
His
eyes lit up. ÒReally? I may officially love you.Ó
ÒI
thought you already did?Ó
ÒYeah,
but I may declare it from the rooftops.
If I can find some on this ship.Ó
He grinned. ÒThank you.Ó
ÒYouÕre
welcome.Ó She was amazed at how
happy sheÕd just made him. ÒSo this
place. Is it a hair up or hair down
spot? Sundress or gown?Ó
ÒHair
down. Sundress.Ó
ÒOkay. What makes it special?Ó
ÒIÕve
been going there all my life. It
has the best seafood youÕll ever want to eat. ItÕs casual, but the wait staff treat you like kings and queens. And I love the view—itÕs right on
the river.Ó
ÒSounds
nice.Ó
ÒIt
will be.Ó He smoothed a tendril
that had worked its way from her hair clips off her cheek, his eyes incredibly
tender, then he turned and walked out.
The
scent of the rose was filling the room.
She could still feel his hand on her cheek and remembered the way heÕd
touched her when he was massaging her neck. She felt a little warm feeling in her
stomach, the slight twist of desire.
She
had to give it to him. Len was
better at this than sheÕd thought he would be.
##
McCoy
changed his clothes three times before he finally settled on an outfit for
dinner in Savannah. He didnÕt want
to look like he was trying too hard, but he didnÕt want to look like he wasnÕt
trying hard enough, either. The
last outfit seemed to fit the happy medium of just enough effort. He wished—not for the first time
in his life—that he was taller, not so thin,
more handsome. Maybe had pointed ears.
Damn
it all. Why was he so nervous? They were just eating dinner at one of
his favorite restaurants. This was
a first date.
Oh,
shit, yeah. This was the first date.
He
really wanted a bourbon but sheÕd smell it on his
breath. And he didnÕt want to show
any weakness. Why the hell hadnÕt
he stocked away some decent anti-anxiety drugs just on the off chance Christine
ever said ÒWhy, yes, kind sir, I will go out with youÓ? What the hell was the matter with him?
He
leaned over the counter in the bathroom, looked in the mirror, gave himself a
fierce glare, and said with as much of a snarl as he could, ÒPull yourself
together, man.Ó
Then
he stood up, made sure he had his credits fully stocked in his account, and
left his quarters for the short walk to hers. He tried to ignore that his palms were
sweaty.
She
didnÕt open the door on first chime but got it as he rang again, still in her
robe, a little flushed. ÒIÕm so
sorry. IÕm having a dress dilemma.Ó
He
smiled, and suddenly felt himself relax. ÒI had one of those. Well, not with a dress. You as nervous as I am?Ó
ÒYes. And itÕs ludicrous, isnÕt it? I mean...how long have we known each
other?Ó She pulled him into her
quarters. Two dresses hung on the
closet door. ÒWhich?Ó
ÒTheyÕre
both pretty.Ó
ÒI
know. IÕm, IÕm...stuck. I put one on and then I think the other
one would be better.Ó
He
rubbed her back, hoping it would calm her a little. ÒThis is the third dashing ensemble IÕve
had on tonight. It is the first
date, after all.Ó
ÒExactly. And thereÕs expectations and rituals and...Ó She turned
to look at him and swallowed hard.
ÒWill you do something for me?Ó
ÒMaybe.Ó
She
smiled at the way heÕd said it.
ÒJust...kiss me. ItÕs gonna sit there otherwise. This thing at the end
of the night that we might do...or we might not. Something might happen, one us might get
struck by lightning.Ó
ÒI
donÕt think so. No storms tonight.Ó But he smiled at her whimsy.
ÒJust...can
we get it out of the way?Ó
ÒThat
is so unromantic.Ó
She
looked down. ÒYou donÕt want to
kiss me?Ó She turned. ÒOkay, then. Umm. I guess this one.Ó She reached up for one of the dresses,
and he realized her hand was trembling.
ÒHonÕ.Ó
ÒNo,
itÕs okay. I get it. Not part of your plan. IÕm sorry I asked.Ó She wasnÕt looking at him. ÒIÕm just going to change in the
bathroom.Ó
ÒChristine.Ó He turned her. ÒOf course I want to kiss you. And I can be flexible.Ó He pulled her to him slowly, smiling as
he did it, and went in for a very gentle kiss, nothing too passionate or heÕd
never be able to resist untying her robe—no, he should not think about
what was right under that robe.
She
moved closer, opened her mouth a little, and he was lost. He pulled her in tighter, felt her wrap
her arms around his neck, the dress resting on his back.
They
kissed for a long time. It was, he
was pretty sure, the best kiss of his life.
He
hoped to God it ranked up there for her.
When he let her go, she looked a little dazed.
He
played with her hair for a moment; she had it long and wavy, held back with two
clips, and she looked beautiful.
ÒWell, I donÕt have any desire to run away after that. How about you?Ó
ÒNo,
no, IÕm definitely up for the rest of the evening now.Ó She tilted her head, her eyes
dancing. It was going to be one of
his favorite expressions, he could tell.
Pure deviltry.
ÒShow
me your hand. Still shaking?Ó
She
smiled and shook her head as she lifted her hand. Rock solid. She turned to go into the bathroom.
ÒChristine?Ó
She
glanced back.
He
reached up, got the other dress down.
ÒWear this one.Ó
She
laughed. ÒYou just want to wrestle
control back.Ó
ÒDamn
straight.Ó He knew the look he gave
her was a mix of affection, amusement, and pure Georgia passion. ÒBut I also like this one better.Ó
ÒFine. IÕll be right out.Ó She gave him a smile that was very
pleased—and a little surprised.
He
was very pleased and a little surprised himself.
##
Chapel
loved the restaurant. They were
given a lovely table on an upper deck facing the river. The evening was gorgeous, a sweet breeze
playing around them, just enough to keep them cool,
but not enough to blow things over.
On the deck, the noise from the lively bar sheÕd noticed in the back was
muffled.
ÒPopular
place.Ó
He
had a funny look. ÒYes, it is.Ó
ÒYou
used to do more than eat here, didnÕt you?Ó
He
actually blushed. ÒItÕs as you
say...popular.Ó
ÒSo
how many women have you eaten on this deck with?Ó She leaned forward,
interested to see how he would finesse the question.
ÒA
few,Ó he said. Then he sighed. ÒMore than a few. I was retired for months. But none of them were you. And God knows I wanted them to be.Ó He gave her a smile that was too weary
to be anything but true. ÒNot a
good answer.Ó
ÒHonesty
is always a good answer. It hurts
sometimes, but itÕs a good answer.Ó
ÒYeah,
I guess if IÕd tried that earlier...Ó He laughed. ÒWell, this is getting off to a bang-up
start.Ó
She
reached over, put her hand on his.
ÒYou canÕt control everything, Len.Ó
ÒI
donÕt try to.Ó
ÒYes,
you do. What do you think all that
sarcasm is? ItÕs like a forcefield—the directional kind they use with crowd
control at events to keep people queuing up the right way. You like to know youÕre on solid
ground. The rest of us...not so
important to you.Ó
ÒThatÕs
not very nice.Ó
ÒItÕs just truth.
If we canÕt talk about something like this, what can we talk
about?Ó She felt the old surge of
frustration. Why was he doing this
now? Especially
after that kiss?
Ah. Of course. That kiss. She leaned in. ÒYou liked that kiss, didnÕt you? You liked it too much. ThatÕs why youÕre striking out.Ó
ÒYou
have an ego the size of Stone Mountain.Ó
ÒIÕll
take your word for it since you havenÕt shown me Stone Mountain yet.Ó She saw him bite back a smile, knew
sheÕd just found a key to winning a fight with him: hold out the future while
you did it as if it still existed.
ÒI liked it, too, you know.
Maybe thatÕs why I need to talk about this? And for the record, this little
disagreement weÕre having was just an observation that this was probably your
happy hunting ground. You
acknowledged that. We could have
just moved on. But,
no. You turned it into a big
deal, not me. Just be aware, youÕre
causing your own problems here.Ó
ÒDid
you take a lot of psych classes in med school?Ó
She
started to laugh. ÒIÕve majored in
McCoy for quite a while. It was
necessary to get ahead when I first started and then to survive once I settled
in. And now...Ó She let her voice dip into the
husky tone she thought he liked.
ÒNow, I have other reasons for wanting to figure you out.Ó
ÒCould
you say that again exactly that way?Ó
ÒI
could. IÕm not going to, though.Ó
ÒBitch.Ó
ÒDoctor
McCoy. Such language.Ó She pulled him to her, planted a soft,
gentle kiss on his lips. ÒThere I
go, taking control again. Are you
going to pick another fight or kiss me back?Ó
His
grin was wicked as he pulled her to him and gave her a kiss that was not soft,
not gentle, and was really good.
Another useful thing to know: the man responded well to challenges.
She
heard a soft cough, realized their server was hovering.
ÒDo
you folks need more time or do you want to hear about the specials?Ó
Len
waved him closer. ÒTell us about
the specials, young man. There is
not enough time in the world for what we need.Ó
The
kid blushed, stammered out the specials, she thought incorrectly, and then
fled.
Len
chuckled. ÒI embarrassed him. Did I embarrass you?Ó
ÒNo.Ó She smiled. ÒSo whatÕs good here? He mangled the entrees, right?Ó
ÒOh,
like you wouldnÕt believe. Stick
with the oysters, the grouper, or the catfish. And the mussels are often good but not
the way he explained—we might want to ask him again how those are being
done tonight.Ó
ÒYou
donÕt think Ôin turpentineÕ was right?Ó
She started to laugh. ÒHe turned
so red. Is it because weÕre old and
shouldnÕt have sex?Ó
ÒWeÕre
not that old.Ó Len didnÕt say it
angrily, just as a matter of fact.
ÒYeah,
but heÕs a kid, everybodyÕs old.Ó
ÒI
think itÕs that heÕs a kid. They do
everything fast. Everything.Ó He waggled his eyebrows. ÒMaybe it never occurred to him before
he could take his time with certain pleasures.Ó
She
chuckled. ÒYouÕd like that. Think youÕd saved this young man from a
life of taken too quickly love.Ó
ÒYou
are not wrong.Ó He put down the
menu. ÒIÕd also tell him when he
finds the girl of his dreams to tell her.Ó
ÒUnless
he is going to contract xenopolycythemia. In which
case, he must wait, fall in love with a priestess in, oh, about one day, marry
her, have an instrument of obedience placed in his body, defy said instrument,
nearly die, and then be saved. Also,
he must fall for Yeoman Barrows in there.Ó
ÒMiaow. To all
of that, but how did Tonia get thrown in here?Ó
ÒShe
just bugged me.Ó
ÒThat
was quite a bit before I got sick.
And after you found Roger.Ó
He studied her. ÒWhat
happened to honesty?Ó
ÒI
didnÕt say jealous. She bugged
me. That
whole...princess thing. It
played into your southern chevalier thing so well.Ó
ÒBut
you cared.Ó
ÒI
was angry at the world back then.
Roger, who I put my career on hold for, had turned out to be both an
android and also psycho. And heÕd
made a playmate who was not, as it turned out, modeled
on me but his other grad student. The one after me.
Who he swore he was not sleeping with. Anyone who was happy was going to get
the stinkeye from me back then.Ó
ÒYou
werenÕt jealous?Ó
ÒNot
then. But if she walked up to this
table tonight, I would be now.Ó
ÒWould
you fight her for me? A big,
high-drama catfight right here in front of everyone? ÒHeÕs mine, you witch. Hands off!ÕÓ
ÒNo,
Len.Ó
ÒDamn. Man can dream.Ó He winked at her. Then he reached out and stroked her
cheek, his face going serious for a moment. ÒThank you.Ó
ÒFor
what?Ó
ÒFor
calling me on my bullshit. It was a
good kiss. I did like it. A whole hell of a lot. Things I like donÕt always stick
around.Ó
ÒLike
I said.Ó She leaned in, stopped
halfway to him, then met his eyes. ÒJust in case you want another before
that poor traumatized boy comes back?Ó
He
grinned and kissed her. They
managed to finish before they could scar the kid for life—and they did
get the real skinny on the mussels.
##
McCoy
felt himself relaxing as the dinner progressed. Christine didnÕt seem to care that he
could be the biggest idiot in the world.
She just called him on his crap the same way she was doing in sickbay
now and then moved on. And
sometimes there were kisses.
Kisses
that only got better the more of them he got. He decided the rule of supply and demand
might be wrong. Okay heÕd give them
that maybe surplus bred ennui on the part of the consumer, but sufficiency sure
beat the hell out of scarcity.
And
it was nice to let go a little. To
not have to be in complete control of this thing. Not that Christine was busting down the
door to domination-ville, but she clearly was not
interested in sitting back and being told what to do. And he found he liked that.
They
finished their entrees, ordered a dessert to split, had coffee and brandy, and
then walked along the river, holding hands like they were a couple of kids.
ÒDid
you make the captain bring us back on a night when the moon was full?Ó
ÒNo,
but itÕs beautiful, isnÕt it?Ó He
pulled her closer. ÒAnd you need to
start calling him Jim.Ó
ÒIÕll
call him that when he tells me to call him that.Ó Then she turned to him. ÒDoes he know about us?Ó
That
was easy to answer. ÒHe figured it
out.Ó
ÒDoes
he approve?Ó
ÒHe
doesnÕt disapprove.Ó
She
stopped walking, a deep frown growing.
ÒWhy not just say yes?Ó
ÒWhat?Ó
ÒHe
doesnÕt disapprove? Meaning
what? HeÕs...concerned? Is it the chain of command thing?Ó
ÒNo,
I mean heÕs fine with it.Ó
ÒNo,
you donÕt. Or youÕd have said
it.Ó She dropped his hand. ÒLook, IÕm a little sensitive around him
right now. The man demoted me. And his explanation was ÔI need
Bones.Õ So as feedback goes, thatÕs
really not much. If he thinks IÕm
not up to par, not good enough to stay, and heÕs worried heÕs going to be
sending me away and—Ó
ÒHeÕs
afraid youÕre still in love with Spock.
That youÕre going to break my heart.Ó McCoy took a deep breath. ÒAfraidÕs a
little strong. Mildly concerned is
probably closer. But this has
nothing to do with your professional qualifications—you have to know
that. He wants you to stay.Ó
ÒItÕd
be nice if he told me that.Ó She
closed her eyes, seemed to be trying to compose herself. ÒSpock and I never were anything, never
will be. Why would he worry about
that?Ó She seemed to read the truth
on his face. ÒOh, itÕs not the
reality, itÕs that you both think I canÕt give up on him. When will this stop haunting me?Ó
ÒMaybe
when you stop lighting up around him?Ó
The words were out before he could stop them.
She
just stared at him. ÒWhat the hell
does that mean?Ó
ÒYesterday. I saw him talking to you in the corridor
outside the lab. You were both
quite animated.Ó
ÒWe
were discussing science.Ó The
freezing cold anger in her voice told him to tread carefully.
He
ignored the voice of reason. ÒSure
you were.Ó
ÒOh
my God, what is wrong with you?
What do I have to do? He
liked a paper I did in med school.
He gave me ideas for how to expand it into something to present at a
seminar thatÕs coming up. You
didnÕt do that. You didnÕt even
read it. I donÕt even know how he
found it, much less took the time to read it, annotate it, and give it back
with words of encouragement.Ó
ÒI
do. He wants you.Ó
ÒNo,
he doesnÕt.Ó
ÒMaybe
he does. And then what will you
do? What will a few kisses in a
little southern place mean when compared to the great love of your life
actually wanting you back?Ó
ÒHe
gave me footnotes, not roses. You
are the biggest idiot I have ever met.Ó
She stared at him the same way she did at staff coffee mugs that had
been allowed to sit around and grow science experiments rather than be
cleaned. ÒIt was a lovely evening, sir. IÕm going to go now.Ó
ÒYou
do that.Ó How dare she sir
him? Where the hell did she get off
acting as if he was the one who couldnÕt see?
He watched her stalk off under the moonlit sky, felt a moment of helplessness
as what had been such a great evening turned to shit in his hands.
In his hands?
Hell, at his hands.
Goddamn
it, he was a moron. He took off
running, caught her before sheÕd gone very far.
ÒLeave me alone.Ó
ÒIÕm
sorry.Ó He pulled her to a bench
that sat near the edge of the river walk.
ÒChristine, IÕm sorry.Ó
ÒYouÕre
an idiot.Ó She hit him, pushing him
off her, but not with very much effort.
ÒI
agree. IÕm an idiot.Ó He got her seated next to him, but she
wouldnÕt relax, wouldnÕt look at him.
ÒHe terrifies me because I know you love him.Ó
ÒI
donÕt even know him, Len. But I do
know you and you know me. And you
terrify me, frankly, because despite that, you do things like this. Are you going to keep pushing me
away? Because if thatÕs your method
for courting, I can see why it fails all the time.Ó
He
felt her words cut, as she no doubt meant them to. And she wasnÕt wrong. He did sabotage things. He didnÕt trust. And he was pushing her away already even
though he wanted her, would take her right now on this bench if he didnÕt think
theyÕd get picked up by the Savannah authorities for lewd
behavior and defacement of historical property.
ÒHow
many women did you pick up from the place we were just at? Women that you ended
up taking home? Did you see
any of them in the bar tonight? You
do that to me and then throw Spock in my face? Maybe I should go back up, huh? See what he wanted? Spock, Len had this idea that maybe in
your parlance, footnotes equal a rose or a box of candy. Maybe what you meant when you said I
should present a paper was that you really wanted to fuck me blind?Ó
He
grabbed her, pulled her to him.
Some part of himself said to stop, this was not
courting, this was not the plan.
But he couldnÕt stop. ÒIf
anyoneÕs going to fuck you blind, itÕll be me.Ó He didnÕt kiss her, just held her close,
both of them breathing hard, lips inches apart.
ÒIÕll
say that, not you.Ó Her eyes were
hard, glittering under the street lamps.
ÒWell,
then say it, or donÕt. My house is just
a few blocks away.Ó
ÒIs
it ready for us? Did you plan
this?Ó
ÒNo. The cleaning lady was last by two weeks
ago unless sheÕs cheating me and not really going in until IÕm due home. ThereÕs no food, but thereÕll be booze
because itÕs me weÕre talking about.
I didnÕt plan this. Sex was
not on the agenda for tonight.Ó He
started to let her go.
ÒWell,
I think we need to get it onto the agenda.
IÕm sick of dancing around this.
Get it out of your system.
Get me—the me youÕve wanted all these years—out of your
system, so you can see the real me.
Maybe theyÕre the same. Maybe not. Maybe
itÕll be horrible. Maybe not. Maybe
I do want Spock. But maybe I
donÕt.Ó She slapped her palms
against his chest. ÒMaybe I hate
you right now.Ó
He
pulled her to him, wrapped his arms around her, and said, ÒMaybe I hate myself
right now, too.Ó
ÒThen
letÕs go. LetÕs just get this over
with.Ó
And
he knew thatÕs what it would be.
Getting it over with. It
would be hot and passionate and horrible in the end. Because this was what he did. This was how he screwed everything up.
He
turned love into anger and hope into pain.
He
felt the energy dissolving out of him.
ÒWeÕre not going to my place.
WeÕre not having sex tonight.
That wonÕt help me see the real you. I need...time, thatÕs all. IÕm—Ó
ÒJust
say it. For GodÕs
sake. YouÕre afraid. Just say it.Ó
ÒIÕm
afraid.Ó He stood up, eased her
up. ÒLetÕs go back to the ship.Ó
She
let him take her hand, but the joy of earlier was gone. Her face was stone—as emotionless
as SpockÕs ever was. McCoy felt a
pit forming in his stomach and desperately wanted a drink. Maybe he should have taken her back to
his place, had her the way heÕd always fantasized about.
What
if he was going to lose her anyway?
WouldnÕt something have been better than nothing?
##
Chapel
avoided Len as much as she could during an only semi-busy shift the next
day. He seemed to be doing the same
with her, which made it easier.
The
atmosphere was less tense then full of regret. She had the distinct feeling he wished
he could redo the whole damn night.
When
the shift ended, Len got ready to leave with Kirk for dinner. She gave the captain a hard look as they
were walking out, and he stopped and said, ÒIs there a problem, Doctor?Ó
ÒI
donÕt know, sir, is there?Ó
Kirk
narrowed his eyes and glanced at Len.
ÒCaptain,
you were talking to me, I believe.
Not him.Ó
Len
closed his eyes, the expression that was half anger and half ÒdonÕt go
there.Ó
KirkÕs
expression stayed the same. ÒYouÕre
right. I was. My apologies. Should we do this in your office?Ó
ÒI
think we should. Doctor McCoy can
wait a moment for dinner, canÕt you, sir?Ó
LenÕs
mouth grew tighter, but he nodded and went back to his office.
Kirk
followed her into her office, and she turned before he could start the
conversation and asked, ÒDo you want me here. On your
ship?Ó She saw his surprise at her
taking the lead. ÒBecause if you
donÕt, tell me now and I will go. I
know youÕre aware whatÕs going on with Len. I also know youÕre not a big fan. But I need to know how many sides your
disapproval is coming from before I decide what to do with that fact.Ó
ÒI
never said I wasnÕt a fan.Ó
ÒBecause
weÕre such close friends. You
didnÕt even tell me I was demoted in person. You made Will
do that.Ó
ÒWill. I wondered if you were on a first-name
basis with him.Ó There was
something in his eyes she did not like.
ÒI
was his CMO. Of course I was on a
first-name basis with him.Ó She
realized what he might be implying, why else he might be worried about
Len. ÒWhat the hell are you saying?Ó
ÒHow
did you get this posting?Ó
ÒYou
think I was sleeping with Will?Ó
ÒHe
fought like hell for you. I was in
the meeting when he did it. Over other suggestions that made a great deal more sense. Why?Ó
ÒIÕve
known him for years.Ó She sat down
in her chair, all the fight gone.
Was this how everyone thought sheÕd gotten this job? ÒAfter his father died, I went to see
him. You know, my impulsive
nurturing gene? The one that makes
soup?Ó
He
sat down in the chair across from her, studied her. ÒYou werenÕt sleeping with him?Ó
ÒNo.Ó She sighed. ÒIs that what everyone...? I can see why youÕd worry for Len. Rebounding from boss to boss. IÕll go—IÕll get a transfer
request ready and—Ó
ÒBelay
that. There were only a few of us
in the meeting, and the rest didnÕt know you well enough to see how strange it
was.Ó
She
smiled bitterly, hearing what he wasnÕt saying. ÒBut you knew my history with Roger.Ó
ÒExactly. But I didnÕt say anything. You were right to get this cleared up
between us.Ó
ÒSo
now thereÕs only Spock to worry about?Ó
He
nodded, but she thought he didnÕt look as concerned about that as he had about
Will.
ÒI
plan to confront that head on, too.Ó
ÒI
somehow do not doubt that.Ó He
grinned and she found herself responding.
He stood, then put a hand on her shoulder. ÒMy preference would be for you to
stay.Ó
ÒWith
Len.Ó
He
shook his head. ÒOr on your own, as
my deputy CMO. But IÕd prefer not to see BonesÕ heart
trampled in the process. Are we
clear?Ó
ÒYes,
sir.Ó
ÒGood.Ó He walked to the door, called out to
LenÕs office once the door opened, ÒBones, come on, IÕm starving. Everything good will be gone.Ó
Chapel
waited until Len had gone by, gave them a few minutes, then closed down her
terminal and left for the night.
She rode the turbolift, considering her next move, knowing it would be
awkward but also knowing she had to do it.
Talking
herself into it until she stood in front of SpockÕs door, she rang for
admittance. She heard the soft,
ÒCome,Ó and the door slid open. He
was meditating as she expected.
ÒI
apologize for interrupting. May I
sit? I come seeking answers.Ó
He considered, then waved her to the other side of his
meditation mat. She sat cross legged, grateful they were allowed to wear pants and
not the minidresses.
ÒThis
will seem self serving, but I come less for myself than it will at first
appear.Ó
ÒVery
well.Ó His voice was so different
than it had been. So harsh, as if
he had not used it at all while he was at Gol.
ÒWhy
did you read my paper?Ó
ÒIt
was an emotional indulgence. I
was...connecting with the things I had given up when I left the Enterprise. I read your paper, one that Mister Scott
had put out on engineering, I watched a video of a fencing match that Mister
Sulu had participated in, you see the pattern?Ó
She
nodded.
ÒIn
this way, I was able to begin to rebuild my associations with all of you
passively while the austerity left over from Gol
warred with the emotional barrages of the meld from VÕger.Ó
ÒThat
makes perfect sense. So you have no
romantic interest in me, do you?Ó
ÒI
do not. You do not sound
particularly upset at this idea.Ó
ÒIÕm
not. No offense.Ó
ÒNone
taken.Ó He studied her. ÒYou said you were not here for
yourself. Has Doctor McCoy finally
admitted his feelings to you?Ó
She
knew her mouth was open, tried to cover.
ÒHis what now?Ó
ÒChristine,
please. Sometimes those on the
outside see what those on the inside fail to. His attraction to you was very plain.Ó
ÒNot
to me.Ó She gave him a hard look. ÒIf you knew, wouldnÕt it have made
sense to just tell me? Turn me his
way and off your scent?Ó
ÒIt
might have been logical. But by the
time I ascertained his feelings for you, I had grown to...resent, is perhaps
the right word, his insults. And he
was not always kind to you. I was
not completely unmoved by you. I
did not wish to pursue you, but that did not mean I wanted to push you in his
direction.Ó
ÒYou
think heÕs wrong for me?Ó
ÒI
thought he was wrong for you. There
is a difference in tense.Ó He met
her eyes. ÒI used to consider
Leonard an enigma. He was a
constant whorl of emotion, yet underneath he kept his deepest
desires—such as his regard for you—hidden the same way a Vulcan
would have. I found his constant
exhortations to let my own feelings out to be...hypocritical. I resented him on many levels.Ó
ÒBut
now you donÕt?Ó
ÒI
believe I understand him better. I
will eventually be unable to credit the meld with VÕger
for every epiphany that I have, and I believe Jim will be grateful.Ó
She
smiled at the easy way he shared that with her.
ÒBut
for now, it is a very powerful force and is making me challenge beliefs I have
held about what I know, what I could have, or what I could be. And also what others are and can
be. I judged too harshly
before. I looked too much on the
surface and did not dig to see root causes. As a scientist, this was most remiss of
me.Ó
ÒPeople
are the worst system to study.Ó
ÒIndeed. What I see with Leonard now is that he
fights his nature the same way I do.
He fears his own emotions with equal intensity. Or perhaps more?Ó
She
nodded. ÒI can see that.Ó
ÒHe
is also like a Vulcan in that he seeks to control what he fears. You, if you choose him, must not allow
him to control you.Ó
She
gave him a questioning look.
ÒIt
is crucial that you remain your own person. I imagine he is jealous of me, is he
not? That is why you are here?Ó
ÒBingo.Ó
ÒIf
we wish to become friends—and I can envision that, Christine...Ó
She
smiled. ÒI can, too.Ó This was the strangest day of her life.
ÒThen
if we wish that, he will not like that you come to see me in my quarters
alone. But that must not deter
you. What we speak of as friends,
as fellow scientists, is none of his concern.Ó
ÒExcept
right now weÕre speaking of him.Ó
ÒI
do not anticipate him being the topic of our conversations in the future. Perhaps you could use Uhura or Rand as
sounding boards if you wish to discuss his shortcomings?Ó
She
laughed. ÒFine. I wonÕt come crying to you. Unless my experiments go flat.Ó She got up. ÒThank you. I appreciate this more than you will
ever know.Ó
ÒIt
speaks volumes for how much you do care for him that you would come here to ask
me this. We have never talked this
way before.Ó
ÒNo,
we never have.Ó
ÒHe
is a fortunate man.Ó
ÒSo
is the captain.Ó She smiled at his
look of surprise. ÒYouÕre not the
only one in here who can read a room, Spock.Ó
##
McCoy
was getting more coffee when he felt a hand on his arm and then ChristineÕs
voice in his ear, much softer than he probably deserved. ÒYou want to take a walk?Ó
ÒA
walk?Ó He turned,
saw that she was watching him with a look heÕd categorize as causally wary.
ÒYou
remember those from when you were just starting out? The lovely below-decks constitutionals?Ó
The
courtship walks? She was going to
let him take her on one of those?
ÒO...okay. I just have
to...Ó He glanced toward his office.
ÒItÕs
just a walk.Ó Casually wary turned
into actually wary.
ÒNo,
itÕs just IÕve been working on an apology to you all day, and I donÕt want that
up on my screen if someone comes in.Ó
He grinned in what he hoped was his most ÒIÕm an ass, and I know itÓ
way.
ÒAll
right. Go clear your screen. You can apologize in person.Ó
ÒThatÕs
harder.Ó He made a face.
ÒI
know. Why do you think I want
it?Ó She crossed her arms and
nodded toward his office. Daunting
Christine was back.
He
swallowed hard and hurried into his office, cleared the damned ÒIÕm sorryÓ note
off his terminal, and came back out.
ÒAll right. Below decks.
Should we just explore? Lots
of parts of the refits IÕve never checked out.Ó
ÒSure.Ó She was back to casual, fell into step
with him as if he was leading the way, but he knew he wasnÕt.
They
rode a lift they didnÕt normally take, went deep into the bowels of the ship,
nodding at crewman who gave them some odd glances. The silence went from wary to curious,
and he began to relax.
As
they rounded a corner into a deserted corridor, she said, ÒIf you canÕt trust
me, then we wonÕt make it.
Controlling me wonÕt be an acceptable alternative to trusting me.Ó
He
had an urge to turn on his heel and walk away.
She
seemed to know it. ÒNo answer? YouÕre so good at forcing
confrontations. DonÕt like to be
the recipient, though?Ó
He
felt frustration flood through him, not least because she was right but also
because he was tired. HeÕd been up
drinking the night before after dinner with Jim, thinking about how badly heÕd
screwed this up with her. And trying to figure out how to fix things.
To
get things back under...control. He
took a deep breath. ÒI canÕt just
turn a blind eye to the facts.Ó
ÒWhat
facts?Ó
ÒYou
loved Spock.Ó
ÒI
had a crush on him. An
infatuation.Ó
ÒYou
were with Roger when you fell for him.
You werenÕt faithful.Ó He
looked at her when he said it, knew his words would hurt and saw they did, but
she didnÕt get as mad as he thought she would.
She
smiled sadly and said, ÒHow young was I then? I got engaged to Roger when I was in
college. I waited for him—I
changed my life to look for him.
And then while I was looking, while I was lonely—because I was
faithful—I fell for Spock.
You never said anything to make me think to look your way. Get over it. If I had been with Roger, I would never have cheated on him and you know it.Ó
He
looked away, feeling like a bigger ass than he was already.
ÒAnd
I would not cheat on you, Len, if I was with you. But if you canÕt ever believe that, then
this will not work.Ó She touched
his chin, made him turn back to look at her. ÒSpock and I may become friends. Other men and I may become friends. What will you do then?Ó
ÒPout
like a little girl.Ó
She
smiled. ÒIf only it were just
that.Ó She took his hand, got him
walking again, and he was surprised how long she held on before she let
go. ÒWhen you touched me—when
we kissed, especially—I felt something. I was surprised how much I felt. YouÕre lucky I felt that, or IÕd be long
gone. You need to know that.Ó
ÒI
was wondering.Ó He smiled, wondered
if heÕd be pushing his luck by kissing her again, reminding her what it was she
felt.
ÒI
know exactly what youÕre thinking at this moment,Ó she said, with a small grin. ÒDo not even try it, mister.Ó
ÒDamn. Tough crowd.Ó
ÒWeÕre
here to walk. Back to courtship or
did you forget that was your intent?Ó
ÒI
may have lost the mission somewhere along the line.Ó
ÒWell,
next time you may lose me. So play this
carefully from here on out. You
wonÕt get a lot more chances.Ó Her
expression wasnÕt angry, wasnÕt even very sad. It was resolved. The same way heÕd seen it when sheÕd
first shown up, after convincing Jim he should sign her on as head nurse
despite her glaring lack of experience.
And later, when sheÕd gotten into med school, leaving before McCoy was
ready for her to. Just as heÕd made
up his mind to tell her how he felt.
ÒIÕll
play this carefully,Ó he said.
ÒNow, letÕs walk.Ó
##
Chapel
sat with Ny and Jan in the bar again. Not a Caribbean night, thank God. Just a regular night, with regular
dancing, and Jan had her eyes peeled for the captain. TheyÕd never gotten their dance, either.
Chapel
didnÕt have the heart to tell her they never would. She imagined eventually Jan would figure
it out on her own.
Chapel
saw Kirk and Spock come in together, and as they headed for the bar, Jan smiled
at Kirk, and said, ÒAre they playing our song, sir?Ó
ÒYou
do still have first dibs, I guess.Ó
He shot her a smile that clearly said to not take that too seriously
even if he was leading her onto the dance floor.
She
gave him a smile back that Chapel thought meant she heard and understood. Chapel shared a smile with Spock, then moved over so he could sit between her and Ny.
She
saw Len come in a moment later. He
gave her a slight bow of his head but then made his way to the bar by a more circuitous
route, ending up on the other side.
A lieutenant from engineering came up as she was looking to see where
Len had landed, asked her to dance, and she followed him onto the dance floor.
She
realized Len was watching her, bourbon in hand, a lazy smile playing at his
mouth. She narrowed her eyes,
wondering what he was up to, sure heÕd cut in at any
moment.
He
didnÕt.
Three
more men asked her to dance before he finally found his way over to her as her
partner was letting her go, claiming her for the next dance as if it really was
an old time cotillion and they still taught how to gracefully change partners.
ÒWhatÕs
your strategy, mister?Ó she asked, then sighed as he led her into the dance. He was better than the others were. She liked the way he held her more. She liked the feel of his hands on her.
ÒGiving
you a taste of that trust you wanted.
Giving myself a taste of just watching you with other men.Ó
ÒThat
wonÕt extend to other venues, will it?Ó
She started to laugh.
ÒYou
know me better than that.Ó He
sighed. ÒI always loved dancing
with you. We did do that.Ó
ÒYes,
we did do this.Ó TheyÕd been
partners of choice much of the time.
How hard had that been for him?
ÒYou never used to hold me this close.Ó
ÒFor
obvious reasons, IÕd think.Ó He
moved a little, and she could feel the obvious reason. She smiled. ÒWipe that grin off your face or
everyone will start pointing and laughing at the foolish old doctor with the years-long
crush.Ó
ÒTechnically
that could be either of us.Ó
ÒTrue.Ó He chuckled, the sound low and rough in
her ear. ÒAlthough I am a lot older
than you.Ó
ÒOlder
never bothered me. I think you know
that.Ó
ÒThat
thought keeps me going some days, my darling.Ó Again the chuckle, a sound she could so
easily get used to. Such a sexy laugh,
especially when it was so close and low, and accompanied by his hands on her
this way. ÒChristine, I donÕt like
watching you with other men.Ó
ÒI
donÕt—Ó
ÒLet
me finish. I donÕt like it, but
IÕll get used to it. If I know IÕm
the only one who takes you to bed.
Who kisses you. YouÕre right: IÕve let control become my
default. I need to trust you. With whomever you want to be around.Ó
ÒEven
Spock?Ó
ÒEvenÓ—he
took a deep breath—ÒSpock.Ó
ÒI
like that attitude.Ó
ÒIÕll
learn to like it. You can help.Ó
ÒDo
another weekly report for you?Ó
ÒI
was thinking something a bit more personal.Ó He pulled away, and she thought he
needed to see her face. ÒTonight
maybe?Ó
ÒTonight? Ooh. Big move.Ó
ÒTotally
wrong move, if I were playing this right.
If I were controlling this.Ó
ÒI
get that. Very spontaneous.Ó She brushed her fingers through his hair
near his temples, saw his eyes widen a bit at such an open display. ÒProbably a reaction to all that nasty
trust.Ó She let her fingers run
down his cheek.
ÒAre
you really caressing me on the dance floor?Ó
ÒIf
you want it tonight, then someone should notice weÕre together. Even if itÕs just the
couple of ensigns manning the music. I donÕt want to sneak around.Ó
ÒI
donÕt, either.Ó
ÒThen
weÕre agreed.Ó She smiled at
him. ÒTonightÕs fine. I want to.Ó
ÒYou
want to?Ó
She
nodded. ÒI really want to. ItÕs
been a long time since I have.Ó She
saw something on his face. ÒI know
it hasnÕt been for you. You had all
those months in Savannah. ThatÕs
okay.Ó
ÒI
wish it had been. ThatÕs all. I just wish it had been.Ó
ÒSuch
a romantic under all that SOB.Ó
ÒThatÕs
probably the root of all my problems.Ó
He spun her as the music ended.
As Sulu came up with a grin and a hand out to her, Len said, ÒBeat it, Hikaru. SheÕs
mine tonight. Ask her to dance at
the next party.Ó
Chapel
started to laugh. ÒUhhhhh?Ó
He
made a face, but there was no trace of anything that really bothered her in the
expression, just some garden-variety frustration. ÒIÕm sorry, Christine, but you cannot
tell a man that you are going to sleep with him in a few hours—or did you
mean minutes? Minutes would be
better. And then go dance with
another man. I will resume my
posture of trust after weÕve had sex for the first time.Ó
She
let him pull her closer, then laughed as he nuzzled
her neck in what she thought was an unconscious move. ÒOh, very well. IÕll let it go this time.Ó
##
McCoy
wondered just how long Christine was going to torture him. Minutes had turned into hours. On and off the dance
floor. They
mingled—clearly more a couple than two friends. He knew what she was doing and approved
heartily, even did his best to help the picture along, getting her refills,
touching her every now and then.
But
he wanted her in the worst way, wanted to get the hell out of there and start
with showing her how the hell he felt, not watch her talking to Spock and Jim,
even if it was nice to realize she really didnÕt seem to look at Spock with any
sort of googly type of expression.
Finally,
she turned to him and said softly, ÒIÕm getting tired. Think IÕll turn in.Ó
ÒMe,
too.Ó
They
said goodnight to the others, and he thought they were not fooling Jim by the
brightness of his friendÕs smile, but no one else seemed to pay them much mind.
ÒDamn
it all, next time they have an opening for grand inquisitor, I know who IÕm
nominating,Ó he said as they hit the turbolift.
She
laughed. ÒAnything worth having is
worth waiting for.Ó
ÒYes,
and I will make you remember that just a little bit from now. You wait and see.Ó He cocked an eyebrow at her, earned
himself another laugh. Silly woman
if she thought he was kidding.
They
got to their deck, and he leaned in as they walked out of the lift. ÒYour quarters or mine?Ó
ÒYour
choice.Ó
He
smiled. ÒIÕm going to give up
control. In this
aspect, anyway. Tonight.Ó
ÒCaveat
that anymore and youÕll have nowhere left to go.Ó
ÒI
know. I thought of that. So?Ó
ÒMy
place.Ó
ÒYour
place it is.Ó He put his arm around
her, could feel his heart beating like a drum.
She
palmed them in, turned to look at him the minute the door closed behind
them. ÒI want you to kiss me so
bad.Ó
ÒWell,
never let it be said that I denied a lady something like that.Ó He pulled her to him, enjoying how
easily she moved into his arms, how she twined her arms around his neck like
sheÕd been doing it for years. How
easy it was to kiss each other, to push her up against the wall, to pull her
leg up, run his hands down her hip and lower.
She
moaned and he was in a place heÕd only visited in his fantasies with her body
pressed tightly to his. He pulled
away, long enough to see how swollen her lips looked from his kisses, how her
eyes were half closed, how she smiled and said his name a way heÕd never heard
before.
ÒI
love this dress, but it needs to come off you.Ó He began to undo the fastener, and she
slipped her arms out when he needed her to, let it fall around her. He knew his
hands were shaking so he pulled his own shirt off rather than moving on to her
bra, then he smiled when she took over and began
undoing his pants. He felt his
nerves calm down, reached around and unhooked her bra, slid it off her, then
her underwear, then stepped out of his.
There,
finally. Naked. And they were still only feet from her
door. He studied her, smiled as he
did. ÒYou are so beautiful. I made up stuff in my mind. It wasnÕt as good as this.Ó
She
looked down and he knew if the lights had been on higher, he would have seen
her blushing.
He
took her hand, led her to the bed.
Then he kissed her again and she murmured between his kisses, ÒYouÕre
really good at this,Ó and he said, Òthank you for noticing,Ó and then they fell
back onto the bed, their kisses growing more fierce,
exploring each otherÕs bodies.
She
moaned every time he swept his hands down her belly and hips, and he finally
stopped kissing her, eased back, and said, ÒRemember how things worth having
are worth waiting for?Ó
She
nodded, a smile on her face.
ÒYou
may regret saying that.Ó He kissed
his way down her body, stopping at her breasts for a very long time, but
letting his fingers play other places, never doing more than tease a little. She began to make the groan that was
half complaint, and he smiled as he finally left her chest and kissed his way
down to where his fingers were.
She
moaned, ÒYes, please.Ó
He
began to lick and suck. But not the
way she wanted him to. And he
grinned as she arched herself up, as if she could make
him do what she wanted, make him finish this.
ÒWait
for it, Christine.Ó
ÒDamn
you.Ó
ÒTold
you.Ó He went back to torturing
her, enjoying it even more as he watched her responding to what he was doing,
to everything he was doing. She was
utterly present and utterly his at this moment.
ÒLen,
please.Ó She arched again and he
took pity on her, moved his tongue just enough and heard her cry out, her body
going rigid for a moment. He rode
it out with her, enjoying the feel of her pleasure.
She
was breathing hard as he moved up her body, as he eased into her, but she
wrapped her legs around him, pulling him in tighter, in what was, if he
admitted it, his biggest fantasy.
Taking her this way, with her pulling him deeper inside—it was
what heÕd always wanted. Not that
heÕd sneeze later at her riding him to completion, or him being behind her, or
any of the other ways heÕd thought of having sex with her over the years. But this, for their first
time—this was perfect.
She
seemed to be coming back from her orgasm, her eyes more focused, and she pulled
him down to her for a deep kiss. He
moved slowly, not wanting to come too fast, not when it felt so damn good to be
inside her. He felt her run her
hands down his back, her touch silky and ticklish, and he smiled at the
sensation.
ÒMy
God, I love you.Ó He stopped moving. He had not meant to say that.
She
smiled at him. ÒJust keep
going. IÕll get there.Ó
And
he knew what she meant. Was glad
she wasnÕt going to lie to him.
DidnÕt want her to say she loved him if she didnÕt yet. But she was here. She was here and she might get there.
She
arched up into him. ÒI said keep
going.Ó A sensual smile accompanied
the movement. Then she pulled him
down for another kiss.
He
started moving again, not caring about going slowly anymore or coming too
fast. He thrust the way he wanted
to, let go, and buried himself in her.
It
lasted longer than he thought it would.
When release came, he felt as if he might black out, knew he was calling
out her name too loudly because she had her hand over his mouth, was laughing
softly as she kissed his cheek.
ÒSorry,Ó
he murmured into her hair.
ÒDonÕt
ever be sorry for that,Ó she whispered into his ear as she let him roll them
onto their sides. ÒYou were lost in
me.Ó
ÒYes,
I was.Ó
ÒNo
oneÕs ever been lost in me before.Ó
ÒWell,
I donÕt tend to get lost doing that.
YouÕre special.Ó He ran his
hand down her cheek. ÒSo special. And you donÕt have to love me. DonÕt ever say it back till itÕs true.Ó
ÒI
wonÕt.Ó She kissed him gently. ÒAlthough I do love you. Just...not the way you want. Not yet. But give me time.Ó
ÒAll
the time you want. The downside for
you is that the time will have to be spent with me.Ó
She
laughed softly. ÒYes, that is the
downside. Think of all the orgasms
IÕm going to have to endure. Holy
God, youÕre good at those.Ó
He
beamed, knew he was doing it, couldnÕt help it. A man liked to hear praise like that. ÒI imagine youÕre good at those kind of
things, as well.Ó
She
was grinning. ÒI imagine I
am.Ó Her grin grew wider. ÒMaybe in a bit youÕll find out.Ó
Another favorite fantasy that might come true. His life was complete.
##
Chapel
woke up, her body aching from a night of lovemaking. Len was spooned behind her and the only
part of her body that didnÕt hurt was her back where he supported her.
ÒYou
awake, hon?Ó He sounded like she felt.
ÒDid
you get the call sign of the shuttle that ran over us?Ó
He
laughed and kissed her neck. ÒIÕm
not sure I can walk.Ó
ÒIÕm
not sure I can either.Ó She turned
so she could see his face, smiled at him in what she knew was a more carefree
way than her norm. ÒI feel pretty
great in other ways, though.Ó
ÒYeah,
me, too.Ó His grin was huge.
Her
stomach rumbled and she knew she turned red. ÒAnd IÕm starving. Clearly.Ó
ÒI
am famished.Ó He looked over her
shoulder to where her chrono sat. ÒIf we shower together, there is no way
weÕll get breakfast.Ó
ÒI
know.Ó She leaned in, kissed him
gently. ÒAnd I will be in traction
if we try to have sex again without a break.Ó
ÒHow
about I meet you in the corridor in fifteen minutes. Showered and in uniform.Ó
ÒSounds
good.Ó As he started to get up, she
pulled him back down. ÒJust in case
I wasnÕt clear, that break I just mentioned only has to be until tonight. Or even, say...lunch?Ó
He
started to laugh. ÒThank you for
clearing that up. I was wondering.Ó He pulled the sheet off her, stared down
for a long moment. ÒNeed this to
last me till lunch.Ó
She
arched a little, making him groan.
Then he gave her a kiss, slid off the bed with a moan, pulled on his
clothes, and was gone. She lay for
a second in bed, replaying the night before, her mouth curling in a smile sheÕd
be embarrassed to wear in front of Ny and
Jan—she knew it was that self satisfied. Then she forced herself to get up and
get ready, was outside to meet him with time to spare.
They
found Kirk and Spock in the mess after they filled their trays, and the captain
waved them over with a grin. ÒYou
two are getting a late start.Ó
ÒYes,Ó
Spock said, and the look he gave Chapel was one of approval. The look he turned on Len was more bland. ÒYou
overindulged, perhaps?Ó
ÒYou
have no idea, my friend.Ó Len
tucked into his breakfast, occasionally throwing her small smiles.
ÒBones,
you seem very mellow for someone whoÕs overindulged,Ó Kirk said. ÒDo we have you to thank for that,
Christine?Ó He gave her a different
smile than she was used to. A smile of welcome.
The same one he always gave to Len.
She
smiled back. A smile that didnÕt
have anything left to prove. ÒI
think you do, sir.Ó
ÒWell,
about damn time. And
Christine? Call me Jim.Ó
FIN