DISCLAIMER: The Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel characters are the property of Mutant Enemy, Joss Whedon, and Fox Studios. The story contents are the creation and property of Djinn and are copyright (c) 2001 by Djinn. This story is Rated PG-13.
Gravity
Part
6 – Truce
by Djinn
"Come on, put your back into it. A Watcher scoffs at gravity." – Giles to Spike, Restless
Buffy walked quickly back to
the house. It was stupid to have gone out. Anyone could have seen her and
wondered why a supposedly dead woman was walking around the neighborhood again.
But she'd been worried about Dawn and had needed to make sure she went to school.
It had been a jolt to see her sister with Faith. Buffy's first reaction had
been anger, her second jealousy.
She could still see the
impulsive hug Dawn had given the other slayer. It was clear her sister looked
up to Faith, loved her even. And it was also clear that Faith loved Dawn. Would
do anything for her, even if it meant making peace with her enemy. Buffy had
been stunned when Faith had put away her weapon and declared that they weren't
going to fight. She couldn't imagine the Faith she remembered walking away from
any fight.
But this wasn't the Faith she'd
known. As much as Buffy wanted to deny it, the rogue slayer had truly changed. Her
whole attitude was different. The angry young woman was gone. Which was not to
say she wasn't still a dangerous young woman. Buffy wouldn't have wanted to try
to hurt something Faith loved. But she could see that the Faith's need to pay
the world back, and Buffy with it, seemed to have eased.
Even the way Faith looked was
different. Her makeup was softer, her clothing less extreme. She was sexy now
without being slutty. Was that Giles' influence? Or the months in prison? Or
was it Angel's?
Buffy didn't want to go down
that road and resolutely steered her mind to other issues. Such as how she was
going to explain her sudden reappearance. Dawn was right; Buffy did need to
talk to Giles about this.
She bounded up the stairs and
into the front room.
Spike looked up quickly. "Shouldn't
have gone out."
"I know."
He seemed surprised at the
admission. "See anything interesting? Kill anyone?"
"Very funny." She
walked into the kitchen and poured some orange juice.
He stood in the doorway
watching her.
She tried to pretend he
wasn't there, concentrated on her drink. Finally, she turned to him in
exasperation. "Don't worry. Dawn didn't know I was following her."
"Good. She's mad enough
at us as it is."
"At me, you mean." She
edged around him and headed for the couch. "I doubt that she could get mad
at you at this point."
He shrugged. "She's been
mad at me plenty of times. Just not lately is all."
She smiled. "I ran into
Faith there too."
He watched her intently.
"We made peace. Or our version
of it."
"Good. Faith's
alright."
She laughed mockingly. "I
hardly take that as a recommendation, Spike." She looked around, felt as
if she was reacquainting herself with the living room.
"How's it to be
back?"
"Okay. Getting better. Willow
filled me in on what's been going on but I think she left out some stuff."
"Wasn't much time last
night for the full story."
"Or else she didn't want
to make me any angrier than I already was."
"That too, I
suppose."
"Well, why don't you
catch me up the rest of the way? Say for instance, what happened to that damned
robot? Did Willow rebuild her again?"
He shook his head. "Didn't
have the heart, none of us did. She took it apart and we melted what we could. The
rest she used in other projects or threw away. Said she wanted to make sure
that nobody every rebuilt her again."
"Thank God for
that." She sighed. "What about Riley, he didn't come back did
he?"
"Captain America didn't
show his face. You aren't still mooning over him, are you?"
"He's a better man than
you, Spike." Her tone was neutral despite the harshness of the words. She
wasn't sure anymore if she really believed in Riley's goodness or Spike's
wickedness.
"Sure
he is." Spike got up, his face carefully
controlled.
"I'm sorry," she
surprised herself by saying. "I shouldn't have said that."
"No, I imagine you
shouldn't have." He walked away, then stopped and without turning around
said, "Thing is, I guess when you were dead I made up this little fantasy
that you'd come back and see all the good I've done and how Dawn is alright
because of me and you'd think the better of me for it. Maybe a lot
better." He sighed. "From where I stand now, that fantasy looks
pretty daft."
"Spike..." She
wasn't sure what she wanted to say.
He walked out of the room
before she could continue.
She sat alone for a while,
then wandered upstairs. Willow and Tara were out. She was suddenly very tired. She
pulled off her boots and walked to her bed. Not bothering to get undressed she
crawled under the covers and quickly fell asleep.
She woke hours later. Had the
sense of someone watching her. Turned quickly in annoyance, expecting it to be
Spike. It was Giles.
"Oh," she said in
surprise.
He smiled, the gentle smile
she loved. "Did you sleep well?"
She nodded and sat up in bed.
He came to sit next to her
and stared at her for the longest time. "To see you again is a luxury I
never thought I'd have."
She swallowed hard. "About
what I said last night..."
His expression was stern. "I'm
not going to explain myself to you. Or defend the choices I've made."
"I know."
"I'm with Faith now. I
know you don't like it, but you'll have to accept it."
"She and I talked."
"Yes, she told me."
Buffy nodded. "Dawn
really loves her."
"So do I." Giles
voice was slightly defiant.
"Yeah?" She looked
down. Her voice was very small. "Do you still love me?"
"Oh, Buffy, how can you
even ask that?"
She looked up to see him
smiling at her and realized his eyes were full of
unshed tears. "Giles? I've been so scared. It was so hard to hang
on."
"I know." He held
his arms open to her. "But you're safe now."
This time she didn't hesitate;
she held him tightly.
"Buffy," he
murmured. "I thought I'd lost you forever."
"You can't get rid of me
that easily." She smiled into his chest. Her watcher. She had her watcher
back. Then doubt crept in. "Are you still my watcher, Giles?"
"Why? Did you want to
switch over to Spike?" His tone was gently teasing.
She laughed softly. "No.
As in please God no." She buried her head tighter into his chest and
whispered, "It's just that you have Faith now, too and she's not big with
sharing."
"And I imagine that
there will be quite a bit of adjustment for all of us. But you were my first
slayer and you will always be that. My relationship with Faith doesn't change
that."
"Okay," she said,
not quite believing.
"Let's go downstairs
now. Everyone is here. Amy wants to go home and we have to decide how to
explain her absence."
"And my reappearance. I
can't stay in the house forever."
"No, you can't." He
got up and held his hand out.
"You go on. Just give me
a minute and I'll be down."
"Of course." He
smiled at her, his expression full of joy. "Welcome
home, Buffy."
His delight was infectious. She
found herself grinning back broadly even if she still wasn't exactly sure what
home meant.
##
Xander looked around the
living room. This was all so weird. And so great. Buffy was back, Amy was
human, even seeing Spike and Faith was somehow normal now. Dawn came in holding
a cola and she seemed subdued. "Hey, Dawnster, come
sit next to me."
She smiled and joined him on
the couch.
"So
what's with the long face?"
"School sucked."
He chuckled. "I hear you
there. It's really unfair we have to sit in school for all those years and miss
out on some quality sleeping time."
She giggled. "Where's
Anya?"
He rolled his eyes. "She's
up with Tara searching the internet for a wedding dress she liked. Someone she
once granted the power of the wish wore it."
"How long ago?"
"Oh, 1481 I think she
said." He shrugged. "Apparently the blushing bride sat for some
famous painter. If Anya can find the portrait, she can get the dress
copied."
"Seems like a lot of
work for a dress you only wear once."
"Preaching to the choir,
Dawnster." He saw Anya and Tara coming down the
stairs. Anya held some papers in her hand. "Looks like they met with
success."
"See," Anya said as
she sat down on the other side of Xander and held out the picture. "Isn't
it beautiful?"
He looked at the dress. It
was white and sort of involved. He wasn't sure why it was prettier than any of
the other dresses she'd shown him. "It's great, An. Whatever you want, you
know that."
She kissed him. "I know.
I want our wedding to be perfect."
"As long as you're in
it, it will be," he said, trying to ignore Dawn who was making gagging
motions.
"I saw that," Anya
told her. "Keep it up and you won't be the flower girl."
"I don't want to be the
flower girl. And I'm like way too old."
"I have to have a flower
girl. All the books say so. A young girl to strew lovely petals ahead of me. It's
required. And you're the only young girl I know."
Dawn rolled her eyes. "Fine,
I'm the strewer."
"Strewer. Slayer. Man,
are you multi-talented." Xander winked at her.
Buffy walked over and Anya
dug into her purse. The ex-demon pulled out a fabric swatch and handed it to
the slayer. "I've decided you can be one of my attendants."
"Oh, joy." Buffy
eyed the peach taffeta dubiously. "Who else is going to be in it?"
"Well, Willow and Tara
of course."
The two looked over with
identical expressions of dismay.
Anya ignored them. "But
I think I need more attendants. Three isn't enough." She stood. "Faith,
Amy, I'd like you in my wedding."
Amy seemed to be frantically
thinking up an excuse, but Faith just shook her head. "I don't do
weddings, Anya."
"Nonsense. You'll look
stunning in this color." She handed a fabric swatch over. "There's a
picture on the other side."
Faith studied it. "This
is like a prom dress. In hell." She handed it back. "I don't think
so."
Xander tried and failed to
imagine Faith in the poufy dress Anya had picked out. Faith may have changed, but
not that much.
Giles stood up. "All
right, everyone. It's time to figure out some things. Let's start with Amy's
situation." He looked over at Amy, who smiled at him gratefully. "I
imagine you would like to go home, my dear. And I know your father's missing
you."
"He really is,"
Willow said.
"But you've been missing
for two years. You can't just reappear without a decent reason for your
absence. Especially with Buffy showing up at the same time."
"I thought I could say I
had amnesia. That happens after a bump on the head, right? And that MOO group
did hit me when they captured me."
"People can go for years
not remembering," Tara said. "And nobody really knows what triggers
their memory when it does come back."
Giles nodded. "I was
thinking along those lines too. But Amy, I think that it would be better for
you and better for us if you were found in LA and not here. Will cause less
questions all around."
"Plus
then you won't have to explain to your dad why you were in Sunnydale and didn't
come to him at once," Willow said with a wry smile.
Faith spoke up. "Angel
can help. He knows a woman who runs a shelter for kids on the street. He did
her a favor or two and she could probably say you'd come in a few times."
When Faith mentioned Angel,
Xander turned to see Buffy's response. Her face tightened a bit but otherwise
she didn't react.
Amy looked around. "I
can do that. But how will I get there without being seen?"
"I'll take you,"
Tara said before anyone else could reply. "I have no connection with Angel
or LA."
Buffy spoke up suddenly. "I'd
like to ride with you."
Giles frowned. "I don't
think that's a good idea."
"Why not?"
"Maybe because you're
supposed to be dead," Faith answered sharply.
"Or maybe because you
don't want me to see Angel?" Buffy's voice was bitter.
"Why should I care who
you see?" Faith sounded serious. "It's just seems kind of stupid for
you to go with them if the whole point is to make it like there's no connection
between your reappearance and Amy's."
Buffy's lips tightened but
she didn't argue.
Giles nodded. "Okay
then. I'll call Angel and see if he can arrange things. If all goes well, Amy
can be in LA in a few hours and back in Sunnydale by nightfall. I'm sure your
father will be thrilled to see you."
Amy smiled at him happily.
"But what about
Buffy?" Xander asked. "How we going to explain her coming back from
the dead? I mean there's a tombstone and everything."
There was an uncomfortable
silence.
"And it's not like your face was all schmooshed
so that we couldn't tell that it wasn't really you that died," Dawn said.
"Evil twin?" Willow
said. "You know, sort of like in the Parent Trap. You were separated and
then impersonated each other?"
Buffy raised her eyebrows.
"It could work,"
Willow said.
"Well except that Dad
won't remember any twin," Buffy said.
"Maybe he didn't know. Maybe
the twin was stolen by a crazed nurse that wanted a child of her own?" Willow
was clearly running with the idea.
Giles smiled. "Yes,
well, I suppose that's a possibility."
Spike spoke up, "Well
you could do like a vampire does. Remain officially dead. Then live a life
outside of society."
"Good idea, Spike. Hey,
maybe she could move in with you?" Xander rolled his eyes—Spike, master of
the useless.
"I'm just saying it's
the way we come back from the dead. Happens all the time."
"I'd prefer to have my
old life back, thanks." Buffy looked at Giles. "There must be a
way."
"Plastic surgery,"
Anya said. "Someone wanted to kidnap you. But they didn't want us to know.
So they hired a strange woman to impersonate you and
they redid her face so she looked exactly liked you. Unfortunately
she slipped and fell off a big tower and then you got away from the kidnappers
and came back."
Xander laughed. "Well it
worked on Bionic Woman,
it could work for us."
Buffy closed her eyes. "Scary
as these ideas are sounding, they just might work."
"Why not make people
forget?" Dawn looked around. "Make whole new memories. Like the monks
did when they made me?"
Everyone looked at her. Then
they turned and looked at Willow.
"I know. You want me to
ask D'Hoffryn for the spell." She looked around.
"Do I have to go to Arashmaharr now?"
Giles shook his head. "Let's
see if we can come up with another idea before we resort to him. Lord knows
what he'll want in return for this spell."
"Don't think you'll be
out and about tomorrow, Buff," Xander said.
She sighed. "Well, I'd
rather we do this right than rush it. But we should get Amy home. Are you going
to make that call, Giles?"
He nodded. "Maybe you'd
like to say hello to Angel before I get into the details with him?"
She smiled gratefully and
rose to join him. "That would be great."
They went into the kitchen.
Tara looked over at Xander. "Can
I borrow your car?" At his nod, she looked over at Willow, "We can
put a glamour on it, make it look completely different."
Willow nodded. "Sure we can, good thinking."
Amy smiled. "I'll be
home soon. This is so great."
Xander saw her smile fade. "Do
I hear a but coming on?"
She nodded. "I've missed
two years. I'll never catch up."
"I graduated with no
real schooling to prepare me. You can finish too. It's not that hard,"
Anya said.
"Or you can go for your
GED. I'll help you study," Willow said.
"We need another
rat," Tara said. At their looks, she explained. "We don't want
anything to look funny right? Willow's been caring for you as a rat, Amy, since
high school. How do we explain the sudden disappearance? I'm going to look at
the pet stores when I'm in LA. A brown rat shouldn't be that hard to
find."
"Good thinking,"
Willow smiled at her.
Xander was pretty sure no one
was inventorying their pets, but he kept that to himself.
Faith nudged Dawn. "We
could be patrolling."
Dawn looked uncertainly into
the kitchen. "Buffy?"
Faith shook her head. "Shouldn't
come out till she's officially alive again. That doesn't mean we get to slack
off."
Xander watched them. Dawn was
growing up very fast around Faith. On the other hand, he wasn't sure there was
anyone better to keep her alive.
"Mind some
company?" Spike asked.
"The more the merrier."
Faith turned to Amy. "Good luck and all."
Dawn smiled at Amy and
followed Faith out. Spike was about to go, but Amy held out her hand and
stopped him.
"So, did you find out
the answer to that question I asked?"
He shook his head. "Jury's
still out. But it's not looking good for the defendant."
She gave him a dazzling
smile. "Is it tacky to say yay?"
He grinned back, "I
wouldn't say tacky, exactly."
Dawn's voice sounded from the
hall, "Spike, you with us or not?"
He gave Amy another grin and
hurried out.
"He's yummy," Amy said.
"You really have been a
rat too long." Xander made a face at her.
She just laughed.
Anya picked up the fabric
swatch that Faith had rejected and handed it to Amy. "Maybe while you're
in LA you could look for shoes to match this?"
Amy gulped.
Willow took pity on Amy. "Anya,
she can't be in your wedding. That would make no sense if she's trying to look
like she's been away forever. Three attendants and a flower girl will have to
be enough."
Anya pouted. Then she looked
at Xander. "Maybe you could work on Faith?"
"Oh no." He held up
his hands. "I'm staying out of this one, An."
She glared at him but it
didn't change his mind. There was little his fiancée could do to him that
compared to what he could expect from Faith if he pressed the subject of
wearing a peach bridesmaid's dress in his wedding. He might be kind of slow on
the uptake sometimes, but he wasn't a fool.
##
Buffy watched Giles dial the
phone, her heart hammering wildly. The last time she'd seen Angel had been the
night of her mother's burial. She could still recall standing by the gravesite
and sensing his presence, holding out her hand and feeling his envelope it.
Giles' voice brought her out
of her reverie. "Hello again, Cordelia."
Buffy made a face.
"Yes, it's me. No, I
don't need help with Faith. She's really quite all right. I was hoping to speak
with Angel please. Thank you." There was a pause as Giles waited.
"She hasn't changed
much." Buffy smiled.
"According to Wesley she
has, but it's damned difficult to see any difference from here." He perked
up. "Angel? I have a bit of a pressing problem now. No, not that spell you
and Wesley were helping us with. Do you remember Amy the Rat? Yes, well she's
been deratted, and now I need to be able to get her
back into human life without attracting undue attention. Faith thought perhaps
your friend Anne could help with that?"
Buffy couldn't wait any
longer. Nudging Giles to get his attention, she pointed to the phone, then to
herself.
He nodded in understanding. "We
can work the details out in a minute. I have someone who wants to tell you why
we no longer need that spell." He handed her the phone and walked away to
give her some privacy.
She took a deep breath before
lifting the receiver to her ear. "Angel?"
There was silence, then an
incredulous, "Buffy?"
"It's me."
There was no sound from the
other end. "Angel?" she said finally.
"I'm here. Just trying
to take this in." More silence. "You're really back?"
"I'm really back." She
smiled at his bewilderment.
"But...how?"
"Magic. I was trapped in
the portal I fell into. They figured out a way to bring me back."
"Wow." There was
more silence. Then he chuckled. "I guess I should be used to the idea by
now, I mean I came back from hell, Wolfram and Hart brought Darla back from the
dead, now you."
Just the thought of Darla
made Buffy jealous. Angel had told her as they sat by her mother's grave how
his sire had come back to life a human, how he'd tried to save her. Buffy could
remember the sorrow in his voice when he told her how he couldn't stop Drusilla
from turning Darla again. There'd been something more, something he wasn't
saying.
"Yeah, well,
resurrection still isn't your everyday occurrence," she said, trying to
recapture the way she used to tease him.
"Guess it's that whole
higher purpose thing. You and I are necessary and all that."
"I guess. It feels
strange though, being back, I mean."
"I know. Nothing's
changed but everything's different. I felt the same way."
"I remember."
"You at least seem to
have come back sane. I guess Giles isn't having to chain you up the way you did
me?"
"Oh, I'm sure he gets
plenty of that kind of action with Faith," she said as sarcastically as
she could, hoping Giles wasn't listening from the hall.
"Huh?"
Buffy felt guilty. She
shouldn't have said that—not after how nice Giles was being. She tried to
backtrack. "I mean as his new slayer and all."
"They're lovers?"
Was he jealous? "Yeah."
"Wouldn't have seen
that. But she's changed a lot since you saw her last."
"Yeah I know." Buffy
didn't want to talk about Faith anymore. "So what
about you, how are you doing?"
"Me? Oh, I'm good."
He suddenly seemed distracted.
Buffy thought she could hear
someone else talking "So you're busy? I mean with the detective
business?"
He was whispering, "Not
now. I'll look at it later."
Another voice was arguing in
a crazy singsong way. It sort of reminded Buffy of
Drusilla. Angel wasn't trying to reform her too, was he? "Who is that,
Angel?"
"That? Oh, that's
Fred."
"Fred?"
"Yeah."
"Voice is a bit high for
your typical Fred."
"Oh. Well, that's
because this Fred's a woman."
"Used to be a cow
though. Heh. Got away and ate bark in a cave," this Fred person said.
"No bark now, Fred. Why
don't you go get some oatmeal?" Angel's voice was gentle.
Buffy felt her heart sink. She
wasn't sure what she'd been expecting. Angel picked up strays all the time. That's
what he did, helped those that had nowhere else to turn. It didn't mean
anything. But something about this one bothered her more than most. "Listen,
you sound really busy with Fred and all, and I know Giles needs to talk to you,
so I'm going to let you go."
"Buffy?"
She didn't say anything, just
waited.
"I missed you."
"I missed you too."
She felt tears threaten and sniffed several times. She motioned to Giles. Before
she handed the phone to him she said to Angel,
"I'll see you around?"
"Count on it," he
said softly.
The voice in the background
was clear, "Don't just count. Make it harder. See like this. One, four,
nine, sixteen, twenty-five, thirty-six, forty-nine..."
Buffy passed the receiver to
her watcher and tried to fight the irritation she felt. She wandered into the
front room.
Willow came over. "How'd
it go?"
"Good," Buffy
remembered that Willow had told her she'd been the one to tell Angel that the
slayer had died. "You saw this Fred person, right?"
Willow thought back. "Oh,
yeah, the one they rescued from that demon world."
"So, umm, what does she
look like?"
Willow frowned. "Gosh,
Buff. I don't remember."
"Will, was she
pretty?"
Her friend grinned
sheepishly. "Well okay, maybe I noticed a little. She's small, long dark
hair, real delicate looking. But she's like totally loony on account of too
long a stay in that demon place. I mean in a mad scientist kind of way because
she seems really smart too."
Buffy frowned. "I think
she's staying there."
"Oh, Buffy, you know
that doesn't mean anything. Angel's still totally in love with you."
"Sure. I know." But
she didn't know anymore. He seemed to love so many people. Faith, Darla, now
this Fred person. Buffy might believe she was his soulmate but it sure was
getting crowded in his soul.
She looked around. "Where's
Dawn?"
"Patrolling with Spike
and Faith." At her look, Willow raised a hand. "You really shouldn't
be seen, Buffy. You know that. That's why they didn't ask you to come."
"It's like they snuck
out."
"Oh, there was nothing
sneaky about it. They got up, announced their plans, and left, same as
always."
"You know what I
mean." She dropped the subject as she saw Giles come out.
"We're all set, Amy. Angel's
already making some calls. It may take a bit longer than we thought. He wants
you to become a familiar face around the shelter so that when you do 'suddenly'
remember who you are there will be a number of people to back the story up. Do
you mind living a lie for a week or so?"
Amy shook her head. "I
was worrying about how I would explain being gone. This sounds good. Kind of
scary, though."
"Just think of how happy
your dad will be when you call him from LA." Willow shared a smile with
Amy.
Tara stood up and took the
directions to the shelter from Giles. "Well, we can go then. Xander, Anya,
you want a ride back to your apartment?"
They both stood and followed
Tara and Amy out.
Willow looked over at Buffy. "I'll
be right back. I just want to help Tara enchant the car. Well and to say
goodbye." She grinned.
"No problem." As
she watched her friend walk out to join the others, Buffy sighed. The house
seemed very quiet and close with everyone gone.
Giles moved close. "Everything
all right?"
"Sure." She tried
to fake a smile but knew she failed. "What could be wrong?"
"It will get easier. And
soon you'll be able to come and go as you please." His hand fell gently on
her shoulder.
She reached up and placed her
own over his for a moment. "It all feels so strange." She walked away
from him, began to pick things up aimlessly from the tables, stopped when she
came to the photo of her mom with Dawn and her. She touched the glass softly,
tracing the outline of her mother's face.
"I miss her too,"
Giles voice was soft. "She was an extraordinarily good woman."
"People lose their
mothers every day. How come they don't tell you it will be this hard when it
happens to you?" She fought back tears.
"I don't know," he
said. "I suspect even if they told you, you wouldn't believe them."
"I never knew anything
could hurt this much."
She fought the sadness for a
moment and tried to be strong. It was too hard. "God
I miss her, Giles."
"I know," he said,
his voice a bit ragged. "I know you do."
##
Tara drove carefully, not
wanting to attract any attention. Amy stared out the window.
"You want some
music?"
"No, that's okay."
A few more miles passed in
silence.
"You okay?"
"Uh huh." Amy's
response lacked any real conviction.
"You don't seem
it." Tara glanced over at the other witch. "You purple?"
"What?"
Tara giggled. "Just
checking to make sure you were paying attention." She glanced at Amy again
to see the reaction.
Amy smiled. "I'm sorry. I'm
just really caught up in all that's happened. I'm trying to make sense of it. Little
things like who everybody is and what happened to things. It's confusing."
"I imagine it is."
"Like you, for instance.
I remember what I saw as a rat, so I know that you and Willow are involved and
all. But where did you come from?"
"Hell," Tara
replied bitterly.
"Yeah? Wow."
"You really are a
Sunnydale native." Tara laughed. "No, not real hell. But my family,
well everyone but my mom, they were pretty hard on me when I was growing
up."
Amy stretched. "I'm just
the opposite. It was my mom who made my life a living hell. She was a witch
too."
"Yeah, so was mine. Only
maybe with a different outlook."
"She didn't switch
bodies with you so she could relive her youth, did she?"
"Nope."
"Definitely
different."
"Where's your mom
now?"
"Tartarus, I hope,"
Amy said, her voice bitter. "What about your mom?"
"She died. When I was
seventeen."
"I'm sorry. How did it
happen?"
"My dad said she fell. Said
it was an accident. But he lied about some other things." Tara remembered
how she used to fear that she'd become a demon. "And he had a really bad
temper. In public he was all upstanding but when he got mad, he'd whale on us."
"So
you think he killed her?"
Tara shrugged. "Wouldn't
put it past him."
"But you got away."
"Yeah. I did." Tara
smiled tightly. "They can't hurt me anymore."
"So did your mom teach
you witchcraft?"
"Some little things. Most
of it though I learned on my own." Tara saw the exit that Giles had told
her to take. She moved off the freeway and into LA proper.
"I taught myself
too." Amy trailed off as she stared out the window. "Wow. LA looks so
big."
"I imagine everything
looks big after living in a cage for as long as you have."
"It wasn't a bad cage. You
could have changed the bedding more often though." Amy sounded like she
was only half teasing.
"Sorry. I'll remember
that for the replacement rat."
Amy didn't say anything.
"You scared?"
"I am. I've never really
been on my own, not even to camp."
Tara pulled over across the
street from the shelter. "Angel said to look for Anne. She's tall, blonde,
runs the shelter. Introduce yourself as Jane Smith and Anne will explain the
plan."
Amy sat unmoving.
Tara leaned over and touched her
shoulder. "Your dad really needs you back, Amy. This is the first step. Anne
will look out for you."
"Okay. I'm going." Amy
took a deep breath. She waited till some teenagers walked into the shelter,
then got out of the car and hurried across the street to the shelter door. She
turned to look at the car and frowned for a moment.
Tara realized that Amy was
seeing the glamour they'd put on it. Tara would appear as an old man, and
Xander's car would seem to be a large sedan. She smiled and
waved, Amy waved back then walked inside.
Tara let out the breath she'd
been holding. They were asking so much of Amy. It was necessary but Tara
couldn't help but feel for the other girl. It was really hard to live a lie.
Tara pulled the car away from
the curb and eased into the light traffic. She needed to get a rat. It was a
cinch there weren't any pet stores open this early in the morning. But that was
okay. She could probably get a rat at her next stop. Tara smiled happily.
She drove for a few minutes,
then parked in front of a warehouse in one of LA's seedier districts.
A young man came out of the
shadows. His wary look eased when he saw her. "Hey, Tara, check you out. All
grown up now and quite the woman."
She laughed. "These
things do happen."
"So
they do. And I like, I like. You got a honey back at college or could I
apply?" he asked as he walked her to a door.
"I'm spoken for,
Colin."
He laughed good-naturedly and
clutched at his heart. When her resolve didn't falter, he shrugged and keyed in
a code to an access box on the wall. The door opened soundlessly.
"She'll be really glad
to see you, Tara. It's been a long time."
"It's not like I don't
call every week," she said gently. As she walked into the building, witch light sprang up ahead of her, showing the way to the
stairs and down to the living area.
She opened the door slowly
and saw several heads turn. They waved lazily but otherwise ignored her. She
walked down the hall and stopped when she came to the right door. She knocked
softly, a smile already forming on her face.
The door opened quickly. The
face that looked out was snake-like for a moment, then transformed into an
older woman. "Tara!"
Tara was pulled into a hug. "Mom.
You don't have to go all human on my account."
Her mother held her at arm's
length, inspecting Tara's face. Her face relaxed back into the reptilian
features she'd worn when she opened the door. "You look tired. And your
energy is off." She pulled Tara into the room. "Your father's not
making trouble for you again is he?"
"No. We've been busy. We
resurrected Buffy. Willow found the spell."
Her mother smiled. "Willow
sounds like an exceptional young woman."
Tara looked down. "I
wish you could meet her someday."
Her mother's hand brushed her
hair. "You know that won't happen, darling. I'm supposed to be dead. And
how would she like seeing me like this? She thinks you're human, Tara. And for
all practical purposes you are or you'd look like I do now. But just because
she accepts that you might have been a demon, doesn't mean that she'll accept
that your mother is one."
"I think you're wrong,
Mom. Not everyone's like Dad."
"But enough people are,
my dear, that it frightens me. When I think of the state you were in when I
finally got you away from him. I'd do anything to prevent that from happening
again."
"It's okay, Mom. I'm not
going to tell anyone. I've kept your secret for two years now. No one is going
to find out. Especially not him. He doesn't even suspect that you're still
alive. He still thinks I just ran away." Tara felt terrible memories
surrounding her, she whispered, "As if I ever would have back then."
"You're a different
person now. Strong and capable. He can't hurt you anymore. Let's not waste our
breath talking about him, hmm. We have hardly any time as it is." She led
Tara to a couch. "How long can you stay?"
"Till nine. Maybe later
if you can manifest a rat for me."
"For breakfast?" Her
mother looked worried.
"For a pet," she said,
giggling.
Her mother was relieved. "Of course I can. What color?"
"Brown."
Tara's mother closed her eyes
and muttered in a language Tara had only recently relearned. "Ketlblm rdzachk portlmb."
A brown rat appeared on the
couch between them. It promptly climbed into Tara's lap and fell asleep.
"Cool," she said,
awed as always by her mother's power.
"You should be able to
do this too. I think whatever kept you human also makes it harder for you to do
magic." She touched her daughter's forehead, closed her eyes for a moment,
then smiled. "But you're much stronger than last time, must be Willow's
influence."
Tara smiled happily.
Her mother laughed. "Alright
I want to know what's happened since the last time you called."
Tara relaxed as she caught
her mother up on everything.
##
"So
Spike," Faith said as she punched the ugly vampire that had been stupid
enough to take her on. "What's the story with you and Amy?"
"Not much to tell,"
he replied as he dusted his own opponent then tossed Faith the stake.
"Uh huh," Faith
said as she stabbed the vampire a little more viciously than necessary. His
face turned to shock before he exploded into ash.
"Sure
looked like something from where we were standing," Dawn said, flipping a
huge male vamp off her back and following him down with the stake. He was dust.
Faith looked around,
surveying the area. There were no more vampires to be fought. She felt the
normal hunger and horniness start to rise. She focused on the latter feeling, telling
it to hold off till she was alone with Giles again. She grinned at how he
seemed to enjoy the enthusiasm she brought home with her.
"Don't want to even ask
what you're thinking of." Spike chuckled.
She gave him an amused look. He
seemed to generally have a pretty good idea she was thinking.
"I'm hungry," Dawn said.
Faith nodded. "Me too. Let's
go grab something."
They walked across the street
to the all-night convenience store. Faith warmed up a burrito while Dawn eyed
the ice-cream bars. Spike stayed outside. Mostly to avoid the shoplifter
mirrors, of which there were many. The clerk tended to watch them all nervously
whenever Faith came in. He remembered her from the last time she lived in
Sunnydale. So she didn't always choose to pay for what
she ate—no reason to get all bent.
She knew it was wrong but she
couldn't help it. Making sure he was still watching,
she stuck a lighter into her pocket. She saw his eyes widen. Yeah right, sucker.
"You ready there,
squirt? We've got lots more to do tonight."
Dawn made her choice and
hurried to join her.
Faith walked slowly up to the
cashier, making sure her hips moved as seductively as she could make them. She
put down the burrito, pointed to Dawn's ice cream, and said cockily, "And
a pack of those," pointing over to the brand Spike usually smoked. The
clerk tried to hide a smile as he pulled down the pack.
He was ringing it up and had
almost hit total when she said, "Oh yeah, and this too." She pulled
the lighter out of her pocket and tossed it on the counter. She almost laughed
at his look of disappointment. She leaned in close and made her voice a
delicate hiss. "I don't steal anymore so you can relax. But if I did
steal, there's no way I'd let you catch me doing it."
He swallowed audibly.
She backed away and handed
him the money.
He counted back her change
uneasily.
With a sweet smile she put a
dollar into the "Save the Children" box. She looked over at the
clerk. "Now this is a good cause. You save them as kids, they don't grow
up to be like me."
He nodded, then stopped as if
wondering whether nodding was a good idea.
"You have a good night
now," Faith said breezily as she gathered up her stuff and walked out.
"Was that really
necessary?" Dawn asked as she followed her out, already unwrapping her ice
cream.
"Yep."
"Whatever."
Spike was drinking from a
thermos when they joined him. He took the cigarettes and looked askance at the
lighter. "The one I have is still good. Was this on special or
something?"
"Don't ask," Dawn said.
"Just setting something
to rights is all," Faith said as she handed Spike back his change. For
once she didn't feel so bad about sponging off the others. "Hey, Giles
heard from the Council today. They're freeing up my funds next week."
"So
I can teach you how to use an ATM?" Dawn asked with excitement—the kid
really needed to have some real fun.
"I know how to use one. I've
just never done it with my own card before." Faith smirked.
Spike burst out laughing. "Ah
the nostalgia of the bad old days."
They shared a look.
"Not fair," Dawn
said. "I don't have a bad past so I can't be in the club."
"Well now. You don't
know that for sure. Those knights seemed pretty set on killing you. So maybe,
as the key, you were used for all kinds of horrible things."
Dawn seemed pleased at the
thought. "And now I'm good. Cool. I'm one of the reformed gang now."
Faith shook her head and
smiled over at Spike.
He grinned back. "So if you're coming into all this money, can I expect some
rather large blood deliveries courtesy of you?"
"Yeah, yeah." She
turned to Dawn. "And I owe you like a hundred by now. Don't worry, I'll
pay."
"I know you will."
Dawn smiled at her fondly. "I'm just glad you'll have your own funds. No
more worrying."
"And lots more shopping.
There's this wicked cool leather coat I've been eyeing."
"Can't go wrong with
leather," Spike said.
"Yeah, until a big ugly
vampire wrecks it, that is." Dawn turned to him. "So you never answered the question about Amy."
"No. I didn't." His
tone was clear. He didn't want to talk about this.
A message lost on Dawn. "So you think you could like her?"
He sighed. "Why is this
so important to you?"
"I want you to be happy.
Amy might make you happy. And she's a witch and all, so she's not just a normal
person."
Faith saw his face tighten. "Kiddo,
he's not in love with Amy."
He looked away.
Dawn wouldn't let up. "Well
you just met her. How will you know unless you give it a chance? She sure seems
to dig you."
Faith saw Spike's fists
clench. "Leave him alone, Dawn. This isn't our business."
"He's my watcher. And
he's in love with my sister. And she's not in love with him. And I'm caught in
the middle. So how is that not my business?"
Faith shot her a warning
look. "It just isn't, okay."
Dawn looked at Spike and must
have seen something in his face that made her shrug in resignation. "Fine.
Whatever." She threw her ice cream stick away and walked away from them.
Spike looked at Faith. "Thanks."
"For what it's worth, I
agree with Dawn. Find someone else. B will just break you heart." She
threw away the burrito wrapper and went after Dawn. It was a few minutes before
a subdued Spike caught up with them.
##
Willow sat up in bed with a
start. "Tara?"
The room was empty. And too
quiet without the sound of her lover's breathing. Willow even missed the sound
of Amy rustling in her cage. She glanced at the alarm clock. It was still very
early. Tara was probably on her way back. Except no, she'd said she was going
to pick up a new rat, Willow thought in confusion. She frowned. Where had Tara
been planning to stay in between dropping Amy off and waiting for the pet
stores to open? There were hours to go yet. Willow's frown deepened. Why hadn't
this occurred to her before? Even now she was having a hard time thinking about
it.
She got out of bed and found
the crystal ball that Giles had given Tara for her birthday. Bringing it back
to the bed she sat and slowly cleared her thoughts of everything but her
girlfriend. Willow stared at the ball, but it stayed perfectly clear, just as
it always did. Damn thing never worked for her.
She was about to give up when
she remembered the feeling that has startled her out of sleep. That Tara needed
her. She concentrated on the emotions she'd felt. Suddenly a mist began to
swirl inside the ball. When it cleared, Willow could see and hear Tara and—Willow
gasped in dismay—a demon. She was about to panic when she realized that Tara
didn't appear to be in any distress. But it was too late. Her lack of
concentration caused the picture to wink out.
She curses softly as she
tried to get the image back. But the ball wasn't cooperating. She tried to
relax, used centering techniques to slow her breathing and still her mind. She
thought of Tara and the demon. "Show me how this came to be," she
whispered.
The glass again filled with
mist. Suddenly she was in another place and a little girl that she barely
recognized as Tara was giggling. She sat on the lap of a woman that Willow
recognized as Tara's mother from the photo on the nightstand.
"Your name means
star," the woman said as she hugged Tara to her. "My little
star."
A younger version of Mister Maclay stood at the door. "Don't fill her head with
your nonsense, Laurel."
"Astaroth,"
whispered the mother. "Astarte."
A little whirlwind of bright
lights began to spin in front of them. Tara reached out. "Stars."
"Laurel..."
Her face transformed into a
snake. "Ishtar," she hissed to her daughter.
Tara looked up and squealed
in delight. "Ishtar. Star. Tara."
The lights brightened.
Her father strode toward them
angrily. "That's enough of that." He grabbed his wife and spun her to
face him. The floating lights went out.
She smiled sweetly. Her face
was human again.
"Don't try your damn
tricks with me. I know what you're hiding underneath that pretty face. And I've
told you before there'll be no witchcraft in this house." He backhanded
the woman viciously.
Tara fell off her mother's
lap and screamed.
Willow jumped at the sound. The
picture in the ball began to dim. Quickly, she refocused. "Show me
more," she whispered.
The ball lit up again. The
Tara that faced her now was much older. She was coming home from school, trying
to outrun the taunts of her brother and cousin.
"Something not quite
right with her." Donny threw a clod of dirt at her. "She's gonna grow up as touched in the head as her mother."
Tara covered her ears.
"If my mom hadn't died
when I was born, Dad would never have married your mom. He only picked her 'cause he thought I needed a woman
to help me grow up right."
Beth laughed. "Big
mistake on his part. Should have picked a good woman, not some sick witch like Tara's
mom."
Tara turned around. "Shut
up, she's b-b-better than both of you put together." She ran away from
them. Finally she stopped, breathing hard and trying
not to cry.
"Tara," Willow
called to her. "Tara, it'll be all right."
But it only got worse that
night at dinner. Mister Maclay had been drinking
steadily and at the end of the meal he pulled out an envelope. "You want
to tell me what this is, Tara?"
Her mother looked happy. "Is
that...?"
"I'm asking the
girl." He scowled at his daughter. "Well, spit it out."
"It's t-t-test
scores."
Donny mimicked her. "You
th-th-think?"
"Stop it," Laurel Maclay said.
"I'll thank you to not
talk to my boy with that tone," Tara's father looked over at his wife
angrily. Then he looked at his son. "You're excused. Go do your chores
before it gets too dark to see."
"Yes, sir," Donny
mumbled and went outside.
"He only makes it
worse." Tara's mother walked over to the table. "Let me see how she
did."
"I told her not to take
the test. Wasn't any point seeing as how she won't be going to college any time
soon."
"She could go. She's
smart as a whip and she's got excellent grades."
He looked over at Tara. Then
he smiled cruelly and threw the envelope into the fire behind him. "I said
she's not going. What part of that don't you two understand?"
"No!" Tara screamed
and ran to the fire. She reached into the flames and tried to grab the
envelope.
"Leave it alone,
Tara." Her father stood unsteadily and grabbed her by the hair, yanking
her away from the flames.
She fell hard then struggled
to get up. She held her burnt hands away from her body and tried to stand. In a
rage now, Mister Maclay hit her hard. When she
slumped to the ground, she didn't get up again.
"Tara," Willow
whispered.
"And you call me a
monster," Tara's mother had transformed into the serpent. "You'll
never touch her again."
And she came at him. Mister Maclay tripped over Tara and went down hard. He reached out
blindly and his hand touched the poker. He yanked it free from the hanger and
jabbed at his wife savagely.
She dodged it. "No, by
Ishtar and Astarte, you won't hurt her again." She rose up and advanced on
him. It wasn't clear what she intended, and Willow doubted that the woman even
knew how to fight because Mister Maclay got away from
her easily. She began a spell and he reacted, jerking back in fear.
"Stop that!"
She kept talking. In the
corner of the room there was a hissing sound.
"I said stop it!" He
struck out at her with the poker, hitting her hard in the head. She fell
heavily and lay still on the floor. Blood seeped from the wound on her head. As
her breathing slowed, her face transformed back to human. The hissing noises
stopped.
He looked around. Tara was
still unconscious. He replaced the poker then pulled his wife's body up to the
fireplace and let her drop onto the poker. Her body fell awkwardly to the ground.
He felt for a pulse. Then he
backed up and began to scream, "Laurel!"
Donny came running. "What
happened?" He saw his stepmother and stopped.
Willow watched as Mister Maclay seemed to collapse, pretending to a grief that couldn't
be real. She was sickened as she heard him say, "Tara fell into the fire. Laurel
went to help her and lost her balance. Then she hit her head."
"It was an accident
then," Donny did not make it a question.
"Yes, an accident."
Tara woke up then. She saw
her mother and screamed. "Mom!' She crawled to her, clearly in pain as she
used her ruined hands. "Mom, no."
Donny moved to pull her off,
but their father stopped him. "Leave her be for now. Best call the
sheriff."
As his son went to the phone,
Mister Maclay crouched down next to his daughter. "You
want her remembered well and not as the demon witch she was? Then you tell the
sheriff when he comes that your burning your hands like that was an accident. You
were clumsy and fell into the fire. You passed out from the pain. You don't
remember anything after that. You got that, girl?"
She sobbed. "Y-y-yes, sir."
"Good."
Willow sat appalled. "Oh
God, Tara," she whispered. "If I'd known what you'd been
through."
The ball sped through the
burial. A preacher said the normal things. Tara stood in shock. Her cousin Beth
held her as if they were friends. Tara didn't try to get away.
Later Willow saw Tara, hands
bandaged, clumsily going through her mother's things. Up in the attic, she
found a small chest full of crystals, incenses, and oils. She stashed them away
in her room.
During the days that
followed, Tara tried to keep out of everyone's way. She did whatever they told
her to. All the life was gone from her. At night, she'd creep out to the woods
and weep.
"Tara," Willow
tried to console her. Her heart was breaking for her lover.
Tara's father became
increasingly vicious to her. He seemed to need no reason to belittle her. Her self-confidence
plummeted even more as he mocked her. She was allowed to go to school and
church but nowhere else. The small house she'd been born in became her world. And
on those days that her dad had been drinking it became a violent world. She
often had black eyes when she went to school. The teachers never said anything.
One night her father came
into her room and found her holding a crystal. "Where the hell did you get
that?" He tried to snatch it out of her hand.
"L-L-Leave it alone."
"It's hers," he said
as he closed his fist and prepared to strike.
"Fog cover all,"
Tara whispered desperately. A sudden dense mist hid her from her father. She
grabbed the crystal and climbed out the window running desperately for the
woods. She hid there for two days. Finally, afraid of the outside world more
than what waited for her, she returned to the house.
"No," whispered
Willow. "Don't go back to him."
Tara slunk into the house, the crystal hidden in her pocket. Her father turned
to look at her.
Willow recognized fear in his
eyes as he said, "I ever catch you doing that devil stuff in my house
again, I'll tan your hide. You understand me, girl?"
"Yes, sir."
"Get to work."
Willow realized that things
were different after that. Mister Maclay never hit
his daughter again. He almost acted as if she didn't exist. But Tara never
seemed to understand that she had the power from that moment on. The frightened
child only saw the man she'd always feared.
The ball ran quickly through
the next few months. Willow watched as Tara graduated with honors. Her family
sat in the audience, none of them looking particularly proud of her. The ball
forwarded a few days then it stopped to show Tara cleaning the bathroom. The
mirror above the sink suddenly fogged. Tara stared at it in wonder. Writing
appeared: Come to the woods. Then it disappeared.
Tara reached up and wrote Why?
If you want to be free,
come to the woods tonight. While the rest sleep. The mirror cleared.
"Who are you?" Tara
whispered. But there was no answer. She stared at the mirror a long time before
she finished the cleaning.
That night, Tara looked
around her room. She pulled out the treasures she'd rescued from the attic and
hid them in her book bag. She found some jewelry that must have been her
mother's and stuck that in there too. She added her diploma and grades, then
grabbed her coat and snuck out of the house.
She walked to the edge of the
woods, wondering which way to go. Suddenly a road of stars opened up in front
of her. Tara started to breathe heavily and her eyes filled with tears. "Little
Star," she said as she stepped onto the path.
The path wound around the
trees, leading her deeper into the woods. Suddenly she heard a sound. She
stopped in shock. A tear fell slipped down her cheek. "Mom?"
"Astaroth," a voice
hissed back. "Come to me, my little star."
Tara ran the rest of the way.
She threw herself into her mother's arms, sobbing wildly. They sank down to the
ground, her mother holding her while she wept out her pain. "Shhh, my love. Shhh. I'm right
here."
Willow watched as they held
each other. She was amazed at the sight of Tara' mother. The woman fairly
pulsed with power.
"But how?" Tara
looked up, joy suffusing her face. "You were dead."
"No. I was close to
dead. But I got better."
"But you were in the
ground. I saw them put you there."
Her mother nodded and held up
her hands. Most of her fingernails had been torn off and were halfway grown
back. "Death shall not keep me."
Tara repeated the ritual. "The
underworld shall not hold me." She laughed.
"We're getting out of
here." Her mother hugged her tightly to her, then stood up and pulled Tara
to her feet. She cast some sort of spell back at the house, and then they both
winked out and appeared in Sunnydale.
"Why here?" Tara
asked.
"I'm not sure. I asked
to go where you could find happiness and the spell took us here. At least it's
close to where I've been living." She smiled. "Oh Tara, I can't tell
you how wonderful it is to live with others of my kind. They found me when I
was weak and just free of the coffin. They heard my cries and came for me. They
put the ground back to rights so your father would never suspect and took me to
LA with them."
"You're happy." Tara
touched her mother's face in wonder. "I've never seen you really
happy."
"We'll both be happy
now, dearest."
Willow watched as they got a
room at the same motel Faith had made her home when she first arrived in
Sunnydale. They slept the night away, Tara's mother curled protectively around
her daughter.
The next day they wandered
the town, finally coming to the university campus.
"I think this is where
you're supposed to be." Tara's mother reached into her bag and handed Tara
some papers. "I took the liberty of getting replacements for you."
Tara looked at the documents.
They were her test scores. "Did I really do this well?"
"I only used magic to
get them, not to change the results. You did that all yourself. I told you,
Tara, you're an incredibly smart young woman." She took her hand. "Let's
see if we can get you enrolled?"
Tara followed her mother into
the admissions building but went alone to the counter to get her forms. Then
they found a secluded spot and her mother spelled them back to the LA warehouse
that was her home. In between shopping for clothes and other things she needed,
Tara filled the applications out and sent them in. Then she spent time alone
with her mother and with the others at the warehouse, all of them demons like
Tara's mom. In the presence of humans, they looked perfectly ordinary. But in
the basement of the warehouse they could be what they really were.
Tara seemed to settle in quickly
at the warehouse. She studied magic with her mother and was spoiled by the
others as if they were her new aunts and uncles. They threw her a party the day
she got her acceptance letter to college. Some of the younger demons moved Tara
into the dorms, then drove away with waves and grins. Tara's mom helped her set
up her room, and as a surprise pulled out the Christmas lights that they strung
over the door.
The ball forwarded through
the rest so fast that Willow could barely make it out, but she recognized some
of the moments she'd lived with Tara. Then the ball slowed and Willow saw Amy
going into the shelter and Tara driving off to the warehouse to see her mother.
Willow smiled at the warmth she saw between the two women when they greeted
each other. Willow had never once experienced a moment like that with her own
mother.
"Why didn't you tell
me," Willow asked the image of Tara. Its only response was to fade out. "Why
didn't you trust me?"
She heard a sound on the
stairs, looked at the clock, realized she'd been reliving Tara's life for
hours.
The door opened and Tara came
in, cradling a rat.
"No cage, huh?"
Tara shrugged. "We
already had one. Besides, she's really friendly. I think she must have been
someone's pet already. She slept in my lap the whole way back."
"What did you do in
between?" Willow asked as she watched Tara put the rat into Amy's old
cage.
Tara ignored the question. "We
need to change the bedding more often. I guess Amy found it unpleasant."
"Okay." Willow
tried another tact. "Did you see Angel?"
Tara looked at her,
"No."
"Then what did you do in
LA all this time?"
Tara smiled. "Oh, I
found this great diner. You know the kind that is open all night and serves bad
coffee and really greasy eggs."
Willow said softly,
"Don't. Don't lie."
Tara was confused. "Well
maybe the eggs weren't all that greasy but the coffee was definitely not
Starbucks."
Willow picked up the crystal
ball. Saw Tara blanche. "I know. I saw you and your mom."
Tara stood mute. There was
fear in her eyes.
Willow walked to her, took
her in her arms. "Don't you know you can tell me anything? I love you. I
love you with a wacked-out father. And I love you with a demon mother. I'd even
still love you if you'd become a demon."
Tara sobbed.
Willow held her tighter. "Don't
ever lie to me like that."
"I told her you'd say
that. That you'd understand. But she's not used to people like you. She made me
promise when she brought me here that I'd never tell anyone that she was alive,
or about her secret. But I wanted to tell you, Willow. I wanted to so much. I
can't stand that this has been between us. I hated sneaking around just to call
her."
"Well now you don't have
to." Willow looked at her sternly. "But it hurts that you didn't
trust me with this, Tara."
"I know."
"And next time you call
her, I want to say hello."
Tara gulped. "Okay."
Willow shook her finger at
her. "I mean it."
Her lover nodded quickly. "I
know." Then she smiled. "You two are a lot alike. I think you'll like
each other."
"Of
course we will," Willow said as the pulled Tara down to the bed. "But
right now I'm still feeling a little hurt."
Tara smiled. "Is it
something I can kiss and make better?"
Willow grinned as she replied
softly. "Oh, I definitely think so."
##
Dawn was making toast when
she heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Without turning she said, "Don't
even think about touching that orange juice."
She spun and saw her sister
stop mid-reach, a silly grin on her face.
"Used to be me saying
that."
"Things change." Dawn
kept an eagle eye on the glass.
"Everything except
orange juice," Buffy said, as she poured herself a glass.
"So
you admit some people might have changed?"
Buffy sighed. "It's too
early for a philosophical discussion, Dawn."
"I guess." The
younger girl held up the bread. "You want toast?"
"Yeah. Thanks."
"No bigs."
Dawn handed Buffy the jam, after liberally smearing her own toast. She studied
Buffy, her sister looked calmer, more like herself. But she also looked bored. "So
whatcha gonna do
today?"
Buffy pretended to ponder the
question. "First I'm going to discover a cure for the common cold. Then
I'm going to negotiate peace in the Middle East."
Dawn giggled.
"Seriously. I'm going to
sit on my butt while we all think of an explanation for me being back."
"Sounds pretty
dull."
"Tell me about it."
Buffy sighed.
Dawn handed her sister the
toast, then put her dishes in the sink. "If I didn't have to go to school,
I could stay home and we could train."
"You're going to school,
Dawn."
Dawn pouted, but she'd known
what her sister would say. She headed out of the kitchen. "Well I better
get ready then."
"Where's all of Mom's
stuff?"
Dawn stopped. "Her
stuff?"
"Yeah. You know, all the
stuff from her room?"
Dawn turned. "When
Willow and Tara moved in, we pretty much just cleared it all out. But I didn't
have the heart to go through it, so it's all down in boxes in the
basement."
"So
you didn't throw anything away?"
"I gave some of her
books to the library but other than that it's all downstairs."
"Maybe I'll go through
it," Buffy said.
"Do you think that's a
good idea? I mean so soon after you're back?"
Buffy gave a bitter laugh. "Afraid
I'll go all psycho again, Dawnie?"
"I didn't say that. I
just mean...it's sad is all. Like we're really saying goodbye. That's why I
couldn't do it."
Buffy walked over and brushed
her sister's hair back. "You don't even have tears in your eyes."
Dawn pulled away angrily. "You
think I haven't cried? That's all I did was cry. For mom, for you. I cried more
than I ever knew a person could."
Buffy reached out for her.
"Dawn, I didn't mean..."
She jerked away from her touch.
"I don't care what you meant. Don't you dare judge me."
"I'm not judging
you." Buffy turned away. "I'm sorry. I keep expecting you to still be
a little girl. But you're not. You're all grown up now." Her voice was
very small.
Dawn frowned. "That
doesn't mean I don't still need you. You're the only sister I have."
Buffy gave a derisive sniff. "What's
Faith then?"
"Faith isn't my sister. You
know that." Dawn saw Buffy sneer and felt irritation grow inside her, so
she decided to strike back. "She's my friend."
The words hit home. Buffy threw
away the rest of her toast. "Right."
"Buffy." Dawn felt
guilty at her sudden impulse to hurt. "If you want help with Mom's stuff,
save it for tonight. We can both go through it."
Buffy's look softened. "No.
I should do it. I think it might help me say goodbye."
"You sure?"
Her sister nodded firmly. "I'm
positive. Now go get ready for school."
Dawn mock saluted. "Yes,
Frau Commandant."
Buffy rolled her eyes.
Dawn laughed and hurried out
to change.
##
Buffy sat in the living room,
waiting for Dawn to leave for school. The house was quiet with Willow asleep
and Tara not back from LA. And Spike in the basement. She grimaced at the
thought of dealing with him while she went through her mother's things. Maybe
she should have staked him after all.
Dawn came clomping down the
stairs, all in black except for a dark pink top that looked very familiar.
"Is that my
sweater?"
Dawn stuck her lip out a bit.
"Maybe." At her sister's look she fidgeted. "Yes."
"Did I say you could
wear it?"
"No, but if you make me
change now I'll be late."
Buffy sighed in resignation. "Next
time ask first."
"Okay. Thanks." Dawn
gave her a quick kiss and was gone.
Buffy sat for a few more
minutes, then stood up and headed downstairs. The basement was lit by one dim
lamp on Spike's bedside table. The vampire looked as if he'd fallen asleep
while reading. His head lay on top of an old volume and his hands still curled
on the open pages. Buffy didn't want to admit that it made him look more human,
or that she found the sight slightly charming.
She turned away and saw the
boxes piled up at the other end of the basement. Turning on a brighter light,
she lifted the top one down and pulled it open.
It was full of her mother's
shoes. She drew a pair of heels out, recognized them as the pumps her mom had
worn whenever she had an important business meeting. She touched the navy
leather gently, then stuck the shoe back in the box, which she closed and pushed
off to the side. Her mother's shoes were too big for her or for Dawn. They could
go to charity.
The next box was more shoes. It
joined the other. She pulled down another carton, opened it to find a mess of
fabric. She felt herself getting angry as she tried to flatten out the creased
in the clothing. "God, Dawn, you could have folded it at least."
Spike's soft voice came from
behind her, causing her to jump slightly. "She could barely see through
the tears. Just wanted to get the room clean for Willow and Tara. Bloody lucky
she got things in the boxes at all."
He knelt down next to Buffy
and pulled out a sweater. "Joyce was wearing this one night when I came
over for hot chocolate. You and your boy were out."
"Go away, Spike."
"Why? Looks to me like
you could use some help."
"Not from you. Go
upstairs or something."
"Don't want to."
"I'm working down
here."
"And I'm living down
here."
She watched him as he got up
and lit a cigarette. "No smoking in the house."
He laughed. "No smoking
in the house except for down here."
"I don't want you
watching me do this."
"Then do it somewhere
else. I'm staying."
She sighed in frustration and
turned back to the boxes.
"Maybe if you'd been
nicer to me..."
"Oh
shut up," she said as quietly as she could.
He still heard her. "Free
country, Summers."
She couldn't stand it
anymore. Rising quickly she hurried to the door. "Forget
it. I'll do it while you and Dawn and the psycho slayer are on patrol."
His voice was gentle. "Buffy,
did it ever occur to you that I might want to help because I cared for Joyce? And
I care for you."
She didn't move, wanted to
yell at him, curse him, kill him even.
She could hear him walk over
to the box. "Bet that some of this stuff has a story?"
She turned to watch him.
"Bet you'd be the better
for it if you told me some of those stories."
She stood undecided.
He shook out a sheer black
blouse. "This is fancy."
Buffy saw her mother in the
shirt, smiling happily, rushing to the door. "She wore it on one of her
dates with Ted."
"Don't remember
him."
Buffy sighed. "He was a
robot."
Spike looked at the shirt
with new appreciation. "Way to go, Joyce."
Buffy walked to him and
grabbed the blouse away. "It wasn't like that," she said firmly as
she folded the shirt up and put it back into the box.
"Well tell me what it
was like." He looked at her speculatively.
"He was a psychopathic
serial killer."
"Oh. You mean like me,
do you?"
She thought about that. "No,
he was worse. He was nice. At first anyway."
"But you stopped him
before he could hurt your mum?"
"Barely," she whispered.
"But you did." He
lifted up an oversize light blue sweatshirt. "What do you remember about
this?"
She grabbed it. "That
it's mine. From like senior year in high school. I looked everywhere for this. I
can't believe she had it all this time." She placed it on the floor behind
her.
"Maybe it reminded her
of you when you went away to school?"
"Maybe. Oh," she
said in wonder as she pulled out a worn gray flannel top. "When my Mom and
Dad were first married, before I came along, they used to buy one pair of
pajamas. He'd wear the bottoms and she'd take the top. This was part of the
first pair they ever bought together."
Spike didn't look overly
impressed.
"You don't think that's
romantic?"
"Sharing pajamas? No,
not really. But then I don't wear any so the point's pretty much lost on
me."
"I really did not need
to know that."
He grinned.
"You're
disgusting." She put the pajama shirt with the sweatshirt.
"You're keeping those?"
"Yes." She glared
at him.
"Suit yourself." He
held up several other items of clothing.
She shook her head. "Those
are just work clothes, all of these are." She helped him fold them back
into the box.
They worked though most of
the boxes, and Buffy found it increasingly easy to tell him the memories behind
some of the clothes. Her pile grew taller as she added the treasures she wanted
to keep.
Spike handed her the next
box. She opened it to find it full of jewelry boxes.
He smiled. "I made
Little Bit take more care packing this one up. Figured there might be some
stuff that was valuable."
She pulled out a string of
black pearls. "I remember when my dad gave Mom these. She looked so happy.
And so beautiful." She rubbed at the beads. "They're all dull."
"Wear them against your
skin for a while," he said very softly.
"If this is a come-on,
Spike..."
"I'm serious. Pearls
need to be next to skin for the oil and the warmth. Try it, they might come
back."
She thought he sounded pretty
sure so she tried to undo the clasp. It seemed stuck.
"Let me," he said,
taking it out of her hand. He pinched a certain way and the clasp came
instantly apart. "See. It's a safety feature." His eyes met hers. "Lift
your hair up."
She didn't argue, just turned
around and did what he said, letting him put the necklace around her neck. To
her surprise his hands didn't linger once he got it fastened.
"Let's have a
look."
She faced him.
"They suit you." He
turned away.
"Thanks." She bent back to the jewelry and started putting aside
everything she wanted or thought Dawn might like in her pile.
He opened a last box and as
he did it broke apart. A small cross landed on his skin.
"Bloody hell!" He
swore as he shook it off his burning flesh.
Buffy picked it up,
remembered giving it to her mom. "This was supposed to keep her
safe."
Spike was still fussing with
his hand.
She watched him. "How
long will it burn?"
He looked up. Saw she really
meant it, was curious. "A while. Longer than you'd think."
"What makes it
better?"
"Drinking blood."
She shook her head. "That's
your answer for everything."
"Yeah. That or sex
pretty much make the undead life worth living."
"You have a one-track
mind."
"At least I'm
consistent."
"Yeah. Consistently
annoying, irritating, infuriating..."
"Fine. I get the
picture." He slid the last box over to her. It was full of papers and a
strange collection of personal items.
"Dawn took these from
the bedside drawers."
Buffy pulled out a folder. It
was full of pictures. The first one she pulled out was of her mom and dad the
day they'd brought her home from the hospital. Her parents looked so young, so
in love. So alive.
"There now." Spike
eased the folder and the photo out of her hands.
She looked at him but could
barely see. It took her several moments to realize she was crying. A harsh, wounded
sob ripped from her. "She's gone. She's really gone."
She felt his arms go around
her tentatively. "Yes, love. She's really gone."
She fought him for a moment. Then
she gave up and let him hold her as she tried to stop the tears.
"You don't always have
to be strong, Buffy." His arms tightened around her. She felt his lips
touch her neck just above the pearls.
"You're getting off on
this," she said in a broken voice as she tried to push him away.
"Oh, of course I am."
He let go of her and sat back. Then he reached over and rubbed the pearls into
the tracks that her tears had made down her neck. "Back to the
source," he whispered. "Mother ocean, Buffy's tears."
She stared at him. His eyes
as they met hers were nothing but kind. She frowned at him.
He only smiled. A strange,
sad smile. Then he moved his mouth toward hers.
She saw it coming. Didn't
move. Didn't try to stop him.
Their lips met.
She expected force and
clumsiness. Knew she'd feel his awkward passion and be appalled.
She was wrong. His lips were
sweet.
Moments later, he pulled away
and looked at her in amazement.
"I'll never love
you," she said tonelessly.
"Of course not." He
began to gather the items she'd selected from Joyce's things as if nothing had
happened. "You want these in your room?"
She could only nod.
He stood up and kept talking.
"Tara got home a bit ago."
Buffy realized she hadn't
heard her come in.
He seemed to be reading her
thoughts. "You were crying. Not surprised you missed it."
Buffy followed him upstairs
to her room.
He dumped the items on her bed,
then strode out.
"Spike."
He stopped.
"Thanks."
He turned to her and gave her
a gentle smile. "My pleasure." Then he was gone.
Buffy closed her door and leaned
against it as she repeated, "I'll never love you."
She ran her finger over her
lips once, then shook her head, trying to clear her mind. She'd just let Spike
kiss her.
Even worse. She'd kissed him
back.
##
Giles was lost in thought as
he drove over to the Summers's residence
"So
you going to teach me to drive this thing?"
"What?" Her
question finally registered. "Oh yes, if you like."
She laughed. "Earth to
Giles."
"Sorry. I'm a bit
distracted." He reached over and took her hand. She rubbed a finger
lightly over his palm and he shivered. "Devil," he murmured.
She gave a throaty laugh. "Somehow
that never sounds like a bad thing when you say it."
He pulled her hand up to his
lips and kissed it.
"I like that. Maybe we
should turn the car around and head back home?"
He was tempted by her
proposal but just smiled at her and shook his head.
She didn't seem surprised. "Duty
before pleasure, Giles?"
"In this case, I'm
afraid so." He pulled up in front of the house.
"Think B's in a better
mood today?"
"She won't be for long
if you insist on calling her that. You know she hates it."
"I know," she said,
her tone only mildly contrite. "I don't like her."
"I know. And I doubt she
likes you. But you did agree to a truce?"
"I'm not planning on
fighting her. Jeez, lighten up, Giles." She reached for the door handle.
"Faith, I have every
confidence in you. You must know that."bHe
leaned in and kissed her. "Every confidence."
She reached for him and
pulled him closer. "You always know exactly what to do to make it all okay.
How do you do that?"
He smiled. "I'm your
watcher."
She shook her head. "Guess
again."
"Hmmm. I'm your
lover?"
"Right on two. You get
the prize."
He grinned as he tightened
his hold. "I've already got it, I think."
"Okay," Xander said
from the other side of the open window, "not to break up this Red Shoe
Diary's moment, but didn't you call us all together to, oh I don't know,
brainstorm? If I'd known it was just going to be for a big make-out session,
we'd have dressed more appropriately."
Giles and Faith looked up to
see him and Anya watching them. He had a huge smirk on his face.
"Oh, like you never do
this," Faith taunted as she got out of the car.
"Well not in a
convertible parked in front of Buffy's front window," Anya replied. "Really,
Giles, aren't you a little old?"
Faith just laughed and took
her watcher's arm as he walked around the car. "This man is anything but
old."
He thought back to their
rather energetic encounter after patrol. One or two of his muscles were feeling
a bit aged. Of course there were other parts that
seemed to feel quite youthful whenever Faith was around. He grinned.
"Oh, this is too gross."
"Shut up, Xander,"
Anya whispered a little too loudly. "If you piss her off now, she'll never
say yes to being a bridesmaid."
Giles snickered.
"I'll never say yes
anyway," Faith said under her breath.
"Anya can be a bit dim
when she's fixated on something," he shot back.
"I heard that,"
Anya exclaimed as they climbed the steps and walked into the house.
"Hey guys." Willow
looked up from the couch. Tara waved hello. Xander and Anya went to talk to
them.
Giles followed Faith into the
kitchen.
Spike was at the counter,
dipping crackers into his blood. "Well, if it isn't the two
lovebirds." His smile took any sting out of his words.
"You're in a better mood
than you were earlier. Something happen?" Faith leaned forward in
interest.
"No. Just had a good
day."
"What did you do?"
Giles asked suspiciously.
"Not much. Stayed in the
basement mostly."
Faith looked at him
skeptically. "Yeah, wicked fun there, I bet."
Buffy walked into the
kitchen. "Hi."
"B...Buffy,"
Faith corrected as Giles glared at her.
"How are you
feeling?" he asked Buffy.
She shrugged. "Okay. Had
a pretty good day."
"Oh? What did you
do?" He glanced at Spike who seemed to be watching the blonde slayer with
particular interest. "And did it happen to be in the basement?"
She was suddenly evasive. "I
don't know. I just did stuff, you know, to forget that I was stuck in the
house."
Dawn walked in on the tail
end of the conversation. 'You went through Mom's stuff."
"Yeah. That wasn't so
fun." Buffy looked down.
Giles studied her. She seemed
on edge. But he supposed being housebound and newly resurrected could account
for that. "You're sure you're all right?"
"Yeah." She looked
up at him with hopeful eyes. "But I'll be even better if you tell me that
you thought up a genius plan for explaining my return from the dead. I cannot
overstate how much I am looking forward to leaving this house."
"Let's go into the
living room, shall we?" Giles led the group into the other room.
Willow looked up gratefully,
then turned to Anya, "Okay, well, we'll have to talk about wedding hairstyles
later."
"Yes, but I don't think
you're taking this style seriously. It's exactly the way Lucrezia Borgia wore
hers at her wedding."
"And you want to look
like a famous poisoner, why?" Tara asked.
"She was really quite
misunderstood. And the hairstyle goes perfectly with my dress." Anya put
her papers away. "I fail to understand why you're not more interested. I
thought that's what friends were supposed to do. Listen, help."
"Friend is such a strong
word," Willow replied softly. "Ow," she exclaimed as Tara
elbowed her.
"A strong, good word. We'll
look at your other hairstyles later, Anya," Tara said with a sweet smile.
"We will?" Willow
dodged another elbow. "We will."
Anya seemed mollified.
"If we are quite
finished with discussions of the nuptials," Giles asked. "We do have
Buffy's future to discuss."
"Don't be so copacetic
about the wedding attire, G-Man," Xander said with a laugh. "She
wants you to wear a kilt to give her away."
"A kilt?" Giles
looked horrified. "I'm not even Scottish. Or your father, Anya."
"I know. But that
construct I made up that thinks he's my father is not going to be in this
wedding. He can just go back to his utility and forget it. And you'll like the
kilt. It's old. And you're old. And my dress will look old. It'll all
match."
"I thought we cleared up
that whole old thing," Faith said from her chair.
"Can we get back to the
topic of me?" Buffy groused.
"By all means."
Giles was grateful to focus on her if it meant muffling Anya for a bit.
"So
what are we going to do? How do we explain that a dead woman is now alive and
well?" Xander looked at the watcher.
Giles walked over to Buffy. "You're
absolutely certain that you want to resume your old life? Starting over as a
new person is still an option."
"I'm sure," she
replied without hesitation.
He nodded thoughtfully. "Then
we have to find a way to make sure that the body in that grave isn't yours. That
a series of mistakes happened to lead us all, and the police, the coroner,
everyone, to think it was you."
"A major ret con,"
Willow muttered. "But no spell?"
"No spell," Giles
agreed.
"Then how?" Faith
was puzzled. "You want us to muddy up the picture?"
"No," Buffy said,
meeting his eyes. "He wants the Council to do it. Don't you, Giles?"
He looked at her. Saw she
understood. "They have resources at their disposal that you can't even
imagine. And they are quite good at this sort of thing."
"Sure
they are," Dawn said bitterly. "After all, they must have explained
away thousands of deaths by now, every time a slayer died."
"Not every time."
Faith looked down. "Sometimes nobody cares."
"Somebody always cares."
Dawn smiled gently at her.
"So
the council covered up the deaths. And inserted the successors into a new
life." Buffy looked at Giles. "But will they help us?"
"I don't know." He
met her gaze frankly. "You've been no end of trouble to them, you
know."
Faith laughed. "Seems to
me they have no choice. They help; they've got three slayers. They don't and
they've got none."
Buffy turned to her in
surprise.
"It's not a hug moment,
blondie. Just a fact. Dawn won't fight if they screw you over." She
grinned. "And hell neither will I. Don't believe
in crossing a picket line."
"Thanks."
Faith nodded.
"So, I shall start
making some calls." Giles rose.
"And those of use who aren't temporarily house slayers"—Spike
smirked at Buffy—"will go patrol."
"Knock yourself out. Literally."
"Real funny," Spike
said, ignoring the fact that Dawn was giggling.
"Shaky on the comeback,
bleach boy." Xander was having too much fun with it. "Gonna have to deduct a few tenths there."
"Deduct this." Spike
raised two fingers.
Dawn giggled again.
"Go patrol, now,
please." Buffy laughed. "The rest of us will just stay here where
it's warm and safe."
"Now, Buffy," Anya
pounced before the others had left the room. "What do you think of this
hairstyle?"
Giles gratefully fled to the
kitchen to put his plan into action.
FIN
Continue on to Part 7 - Restoration